Thoreau - Chapter 6: Chapter 6

Leo Halder
After I finished cleaning the living room, I headed into the kitchen to make lunch. Hopefully, I could keep it down today.
Being a demon's bitch for a year had wrecked me inside and out, and I was struggling in more ways than one.
My wolf, Ruby, was steadily healing my body, and the pack's new flock of witches were kindly working on my mind and heart, but I had a long road of recovery ahead of me, and I knew it.
As I peered into the fridge, my phone rang, which surprised me. It was currently my only line of communication with the outside world, but I very rarely received a call. The demon had cut most of my ties with my former pack members and old friends, and I didn't know anyone in Five Fangs except the alphas, luna, betas, Angelo and his family - and even they were little more than acquaintances who wouldn't bother calling me, of all people.
Luna does, Ruby scolded. Luna calls each day, and she said she will come see to us as soon as her life settles down.
Acknowledging him with a nod, I blinked against the unexpected sting in my eyes. At the moment, a scared, scarred runt was my greatest ally - and I thanked the Goddess for it.
I could not think of anyone other than Luna Posy whom I would have wanted in my corner.
Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I almost hit decline when I saw the ID, but knew I couldn't. If Beatrix Maxwell was calling me, it had to be something important.
"Hello, Leo. We have a small emergency and—"
"Put Zayne or Zayden on the phone," I rumbled.
"I'm fine to talk to you, Le—"
"Put Zayne or Zayden on the phone," I repeated and tacked on a quiet, "Please?"
I heard her huff, but then one of the twins started speaking and he caught me up to speed on what had happened over at the alpha house.
"I never did like Alpha Bellamy Jones," I growled and grabbed a simple protein shake, hoping it wouldn't bubble into acid like everything else seemed to. "Can I help in some way?"
Not like I had much else to do. Going from an industrious alpha of a large pack to a housekeeper left me far too much time to think, and that was nothing compared to the guilt that weighed like lead on my shoulders...
"Do you mind picking out one of the second-floor bedrooms for Reau and making sure it's clean?" I didn't know which twin was talking, but he succeeded in interrupting my thoughts before they could spiral down any further. "They want him to feel at home right away. Oh, and make sure Gelo's weapons room is locked. He mentioned that several times."
"Sure, and of course." I hesitated for a second, then Ruby advised me to just say it, so I did. "They probably don't want to hear this, but they need to put his crate in his bedroom. If his parents trained him like a dog, he won't feel safe without it."
"You're right. They won't want to hear that, but we'll relay the thought."
Chugging the protein shake as I listened to him tell me a bit about the boy, I climbed the stairs and poked my head inside the middle room to see that it was pretty spartan. At least there was a queen-size bed, although it was stripped bare, and a light brown dresser. I checked the en-suite bathroom and closet and found them both just as empty.
"Um, what about a toothbrush and deodorant? And clothes and shoes?" I hesitated to make the offer. I wasn't in good shape to go out in public, especially off pack territory and around humans, but I'd force myself if I had to. "I could take Gelo's SUV and go—
"Thanks, but we're already at the store and Bea is in ultra shopper mode. When she's done, we'll be by with everything," he told me.
I breathed a sigh of relief as we said our goodbyes. While I dreaded seeing the twins in person again, and their mate Beatrix even more so, I was very grateful I didn't have to go shopping.
One, I'd have to borrow Angelo's SUV since I'd sold mine when I left Tall Pines.
Considering half of everything he owns is a weapon, I might sit the wrong way in the driver's seat, set off a booby trap, and get stabbed in the butt, I griped to Ruby, who chuckled.
Two, I would have to interact with people, and I was not in a hurry to make friends. It was enough of a struggle to trust Emerson and Angelo. And if someone in Five Fangs mistook me for a rogue, I wouldn't handle the challenge well.
They would die, Ruby agreed.
And three, I had no money. Well, not enough for everything the boy needed.
I'd given all my savings to Ranger Hemming, the new alpha at Tall Pines, to create a compensation fund for all the shifters I'd wronged. Luna Posy tried to make me save some for myself, but I'd refused until she brought Alpha Mason into the conversation. Apparently, he was some kind of financial genius who could turn a few hundred into thousands overnight.
So we made a deal that I'd keep enough for living expenses until I was back on my feet, and he'd invest the money I got from selling my SUV. Since I'd paid for the vehicle out of my own money about a year before I was possessed, Luna Posy said no one could find fault in that. I hadn't liked it, wanting to donate every penny, but they insisted, and I could hardly argue with my new alpha and luna.
Of course, they weren't mine yet. I was classified as a lone wolf until they inducted me into the pack, which they planned to do at the upcoming luna ceremony.
Unfortunately, that meant Ruby was stuck with only me and Emerson's wolf, Cove, to talk to. That was not helping either of us with our mental health. Wolves were pack creatures and craved connections, and Ruby had only one furry friend right now. The isolation depressed him, which in turn depressed me.
Doesn't help that you haven't left this house since you unpacked your suitcase on Monday, he muttered sullenly.
I told you I would once we're made pack. As we just agreed, we can't risk someone thinking we're a rogue. But at least you can talk to Delta and Lake while the Z twins are here, I reminded him, and that cheered him up a bit.
Zayne and Zayden Maxwell were in the same boat. They'd left Tall Pines so their mate, Angelo's baby cousin Beatrix, wouldn't have to be separated from her tight-knit family. However, their wolves, Delta and Lake, had each other and Beatrix to mitigate the loneliness.
Knowing that only depressed Ruby further, and he whimpered in longing for his mate.
Thankfully, our thoughts were cut off when my phone rang again. Glancing at it, I quickly accepted Angelo's call.
"The twins told me everything," I said before he could speak. "Does the kid know I'm staying here?"
"He does," Angelo confirmed. "In fact, when we told him, he called you Leo the Lion. Said he wants to read his new book about animals with you."
"Okay, wait." I frowned as I headed to the kitchen to grab some cleaning supplies. "The Z twins said he was fifteen."
"Technically, yes, but he acts much younger. He sucks his thumb, for Goddess' sake!"
"What?" My brow furrowed in confusion.
"From what Emerson's shared with me so far, I think he has a developmental delay or something that his parents used to convince him that he was retarded."
"Retarded?" I yelped.
"Yeah. He keeps using that word."
"But even if he does have a delay or disability, his wolf would have fixed it or at least mitigated—
"Don't say fixed around him!" Angelo snapped, then explained how the boy kept saying his 'Mommy Daddy' had to fix his broken brain. "All I know is that his wolf's name is Tanner, he's currently asleep, and Em never met him."
"Oh." Frowning, I grabbed the broom and dust pan. "Well, you can figure it out later. For now, I'll clean his room so it's ready when the others get here with the shopping."
"Thanks, man. You're a life-saver."
I grunted to acknowledge him, then hung up.
Life-saver?
Life-taker was more like it.
Why did Angelo think I deserved his thanks or compliments? I didn't deserve to even be alive anymore - and I wouldn't be if Luna Posy hadn't found something in me worth saving.
I could only hope to one day find the same.
After I cleaned the bedroom, I went down to the finished basement and locked Angelo's weapons room. Then I looked around to see if I needed to kid-proof anything else down here, but there was only a gym and what passed for a safe room.
The house was nearly two-hundred-years old, but the former owner had made a lot of updates, such as the electricity and HVAC and installing bathrooms in each of the bedrooms on the second floor, but either the money ran out before he or she upgraded the safe room, or it hadn't been a priority.
I hadn't been happy with it from the second I saw it, but I hesitated to share my thoughts with Emerson and Angelo. It was their house and I was only a guest until I straightened myself out. I didn't want to overstep.
And they probably already know, anyway, I thought.
Vehicle coming up the driveway, Ruby alerted me, pulling me out of my thoughts, and I nodded.
Time to retreat to my room.
While Luna Posy and the witches saw me as separate from the demon, I wasn't so sure Zayne and Zayden would be able to. After all, it was my face they saw and associated with the kidnapping and imprisonment their mate, the torture of their adored baby sister, the stalking of their beloved cousin - who was now our queen - and, most heinous of all, the murder of their precious mother.
Which is why I planned to stay out of their way until they left. The tactic had allowed me to avoid everyone else who dropped by, so why mess with success?
After double-checking the lock on Angelo's weapon room, I started up the basement stairs, but the front door banged open before I reached the top step, and I swore at myself for not hurrying.
"We're here, Leo!"
Scowling, I silently made my way up the stairs, closed the basement door just as silently, and hoped my stealth might get me all the way to my bedroom before—
"Leo Halder! I know you're home!" Beatrix sing-sang. "Come here, please!"
Well, hell.
Resigned to the inevitable, I found her and her mates juggling big shopping bags as they headed toward the stairs leading to the second floor. The Z twins sensed my presence first and spun around to stare at me with wide eyes.
"Hey." I ran my hand through my hair. "I was in the basement making sure Angelo's weapons room was secure before the boy arrived."
"Alpha—" Zayden began, then cut himself off when I winced.
"Leo," Zayne shot him a look, "we want to say something to you. Are you in a good enough head space to hear it?"
Well, hell, I repeated.
Just take the hit, then go bleed in private, Ruby grumbled.
Taking his advice, I nodded curtly.
"So, uh, we apologize," Zayden said.
I blinked, then blinked again.
"What?"
"We should have noticed something was wrong." Zayne scratched the back of his neck and dropped his eyes. "I don't know if it was part of the demon's influence or us just being oblivious or both, but we feel like we failed you."
"No—" I began, but Zayden cut me off.
"Alph— Leo, what was happening there at the end— Looking back, we can see so many signs that someone - anyone - should have picked up on. Goddess, we were blind!"
"It wasn't your responsibility to be my keeper," I muttered.
"We're your friends!" Zayne growled. "We noticed you weren't yourself as soon as you came back from Blue Rock, but we chalked it up to you having a bad day. When the bad days never ended, we should have confronted you."
"It wouldn't have done any good." I shuddered as I remembered how tightly the demon had kept me locked down. "I wouldn't have been able to tell you anything."
"We should have seen that something was wrong," Zayden insisted. "The Leo Halder we knew was not capable of hurting and killing innocents, and especially not pups!"
I pinched my lips together as I stared at them, unwilling to admit to anyone but myself that I had wondered why no one was questioning my actions or challenging my decisions. Had I been that much of a tyrant before I was possessed? Had I been such a callous and cruel alpha that no one saw it as unusual when the demon took control?
"You don't have to accept their apologies right now," Beatrix said, drawing my eyes to her face and the gentle smile she offered me. "Take some time and process through everything, okay?"
"Okay," I said after a moment.
"We're going down to Blue Rock tomorrow," Zayden told me eagerly. "Bea wants to secure that trunk of magic relics and books you found. Make sure nothing else can get loose and hurt someone."
I shuddered again as I remembered that damned thing and the sleeping demon inside, carefully hidden within a ruby pendant.
"We've already contacted Alpha Alphonse Riggans and arranged everything," Zayne added. "He'd like you to call him, by the way. He was worried when he didn't hear from you for so long."
I couldn't call him when I was possessed, and I hadn't wanted to in the few days I'd been freed. It wasn't my friend's fault in any way, and I knew that, yet I still associated him with what happened.
If I'd never gone down there to help him clear gator spirits from the bayou, I never would have stumbled on that trunk. If I never stumbled on that trunk, I never would have played host to a demon for a year. If I'd never been possessed, so many people would still be alive...
"—eo? Leo? Can you hear me?"
Focusing on Beatrix's concerned face, I realized I'd zoned out.
"Yeah." My voice was husky, and I cleared my throat. "Thanks, boys, but I don't blame you in any way. I'll get past this soon enough, then figure out what I want to do with my life."
One thing about my future was certain: I'd never be an alpha again. King Julian didn't even have to tell me. I knew it as soon as my mind had been my own with again. Something inside me was so broken that, even after it healed and scarred over, I didn't think I could trust myself to lead a troop of Boy Scouts, let alone a pack of wolf shifters.
"We're going to help you, Al— Leo." Zayden's eyes glowed with determination.
"Every step of the way," Zayne added, "and that's our promise."
"Hmm." Beatrix's witchy eyes glowed as she stared at me, and I knew she saw the lie that the twins hadn't heard. Fortunately, she didn't call me on it. "For now, though, you can help us get Thoreau's bedroom ready."
With a short nod, I led them upstairs and was soon helping Beatrix unpack simple white curtains, a pair of down pillows, and two sets of plain white cotton sheets and pillow cases. Then she told me to make the bed, ordered Zayden to fetch a chair from their truck, and directed Zayne to put together some sort of lamp while she tackled the bathroom.
"Check this out, Leo." Zayne plugged in the lamp after he assembled it, and faint stars danced on the ceiling and walls. "It has a bunch of different color settings, too."
He tapped the button on the side a few times, making the lamp glow in a series of colors, and stopped when it turned pink.
"Perfect!" Beatrix crowed as she came over and hugged him. "I think he'll love it!"
"You know he's a boy, right?" I grumbled.
"Gelo said his favorite color is pink." She rolled one shoulder.
Then Zayden came in the room with his arms full of pastel and white fluff.
"I thought you went to get a chair." I raised one eyebrow in question.
"It is a chair." He plopped it in the empty corner and fussed with it for a minute, then stood back. "See?"
"I guess it's chair-ish," I said with a shrug, examining the thing. It looked more like a giant bean bag to me.
"Well, our work here is done, boys." Beatrix dusted her hands and looked around the room. "As much as I want to meet Thoreau, Gelo said it would be too overwhelming for him, especially since he's exhausted, so we're going to take off now."
I nodded and the twins gave me bro-hugs. It was all I could do to thump them on their backs, and no way was I going to touch Beatrix. The last time I had my filthy hands on her, it was to shove her little goldfinch form in a birdcage, where I left her to dehydrate and starve to death.
"Stop, Leo," she chided me as a skirl of heat made her hair start to billow out. "Stop looking back. You're not going that way."
I didn't think Emerson and Angelo would appreciate her scorching anything in their house, so I nodded to appease her.
"We'll see you when we get back from Blue Rock," Zayne said.
"Now that we're Gelo's apprentices, we'll be over here all the time," Zayden said with a grin.
That made me smile a little. I'd always enjoyed hanging out with the twins before—
Just before, Ruby spoke up. From now on, we will just say before and let it go.
"Then I'll be seeing you," I told them as I accompanied them to the front door.
"Call us later and tell us what you think of Thoreau," Zayne said, then slapped me on the back. "Thanks for your help today."
"No worries."
As they headed for their vehicle, I closed the door, then turned on my heel and headed back to the basement. I was fairly sure I already locked Angelo's weapons room, but I'd been distracted and wanted to double-check myself.
They should have bought some stuffies and toys, Ruby fussed as I thumped down the basement stairs. The pup will want something to cuddle and play with.
"He's fifteen, Ruby." I rolled my eyes. "A pup, but not a baby."
From what Gelo said, he sounds like a baby, he shrugged.
Hearing the front door open again, I hurried to confirm that Angelo's arsenal was secure, then went back upstairs and met them in the living room.
Emerson held the boy's hand as he led him inside, and my jaw dropped. Angelo had said Thoreau was short for his age, but I wasn't expecting him to be skeletally thin, too.
Or reeking to high heaven, I grimaced.
Poor pup, Ruby whispered.
I know, but he's here now, and Emerson and Angelo will take care of him.
We will, too, Ruby vowed solemnly.
Good. Now my wolf had a purpose again.
Some people believed that alphas were only interested in asserting their dominance and ruling through fear. They couldn't be more wrong. Above all else, an alpha wanted his pack members safe and happy. Sure, there were boundaries as with anyone in authority, but an alpha was a caring guardian at heart, not a cruel tyrant.
And Ruby hadn't been able to guard or nurture anyone other than me in a long time.
"Reau, this is Leo Halder, our housemate," Emerson was saying as I tuned back in. "Leo, this is my baby brother, Thoreau."
I knew jack shit about kids, but I was on a first-name basis with trauma, which was why I kept my voice low and soft and didn't try to approach him.
"Hey, buddy."
He gave me a cute little wave, holding his hand up and flapping his fingers like a small child, and I waved back. Then he yawned and his face went slack with fatigue, and we all knew he was out on his feet.
"Orsacchiotto (teddy bear), do you think you could help him clean up before we put him to bed?" Angelo asked.
"Shower, please?" Thoreau mumbled.
So Emerson picked him up and carried him toward the downstairs bathroom. Once I heard the water turn on, I led Angelo upstairs and showed him Thoreau's new bedroom.
My eyes lingered on the pink comforter printed with polar bears and strawberries, then traveled to the foot of the bed, where Beatrix had draped one of those ridiculously soft blankets, a baby blue one with little pandas all over it. Finally, I glanced at the fluff chair.
Ruby cringed, saying it all clashed, but I shrugged. The fluff chair had the same colors as both the bedspread and the blanket, so I thought it was good.
Besides, the boy's too shattered to care right now, and his opinion is the only one that matters.
"Great job, Leo. Thanks." Angelo clapped a hand on my shoulder.
"I only did what Beatrix told me to." I shook my head. "How did Tanner fall asleep so deeply, anyway? I'm just asking because I can't even sense his wolf."
"Luna said she smelled wolfsbane on him," he sighed. "I don't want to doubt her, but Em can't scent it. Then again, Reau said Tanner went to sleep two weeks ago, so maybe it's just too old."
My eyes widened. Wolfsbane was not easy to get.
At least not legally, Ruby pointed out.
"You can't smell it, either?" I asked him.
Angelo called himself a glitch, since both the shifter gene from his mom's side and the magic gene from his dad's had skipped him, but he could do a lot of things a pure human couldn't. I wasn't sure how that affected his senses, but the man was called the Angel of Death for a reason. Until I knew the extent of his abilities, I wasn't going to assume anything.
"My senses are sharper than a human's, but not as sharp as a shifter's," he admitted. "Unless it was really recent, I wouldn't be able to pick it up at all. Hey! You should try! Having alpha blood, your senses are keener than both mine and Emerson's put together."
"Sure." I shrugged.
Ten minutes later, Emerson walked into the room holding Thoreau in his arms like a baby. The boy wore only a towel wrapped around his waist, and my eyes wouldn't stop staring at how his skin stretched so tightly over his bones.
"Fell asleep before I finished soaping up the washcloth," Emerson murmured.
When Angelo told him what we planned, he nodded.
"Wait until I wrangle him into some pjs first. He'll freak out if he wakes up naked."
"Might as well tuck him into bed, too," Angelo added. "Sleep is the best thing for him right now."
"He needs to eat something," I muttered, glancing once more at the ribs protruding like ridges from the boy's sides. "Why did they starve him?"
"I don't know," Emerson's voice cracked, and he cleared his throat. "We'll ask Dr. Myers for a nutrition plan."
"And I'm making a big kettle of bone broth later," Angelo added. "That'll stick to his ribs and benefit his immune system."
So Angelo and I waited in the hallway until Emerson called out that Thoreau was decent. Walking in, I saw the boy had curled up in a tight ball under the panda blanket, one hand clenched in the soft fabric and the other curled over his nose with his thumb in his mouth.
As we stood around his bed, Thoreau began to stir. He didn't move much, but his body stiffened before his eyelids shot up. He looked around in a panic until he saw Emerson, then relaxed all at once and even took his thumb out of his mouth.
"Bubba. I thought it was a dream."
Emerson dropped to a knee next to the bed and put his hand on Thoreau's belly, rubbing little circles that made the boy hum and smile.
"It wasn't a dream, honey," he assured him. "Your home is with us now."
"Is that Leo the lion?" Thoreau whispered.
He was looking at me, but not looking at me. It was hard to explain. His eyes didn't meet mine, but I could tell he was staring at me.
"It is," Angelo said and moved to stand behind Emerson. "You met him when we first got here, but you were tired and probably don't remember."
"I 'member the shower. Feels so good to be clean and smell nice again."
"I'm glad you're feeling better," I told him, aware that his not-gaze was still on me. "My name is Leo Halder. I'm a wolf shifter, not a lion one."
"I know. Gelo told me. Can I still say Leo the lion, please?"
There were worse things he could have called me, so I shrugged.
"Uh, sure, I guess. If it makes you happy."
"Thank you." His smile was pure innocence and made the corners of my own lips twitch up. "Leo the lion. My new friend."