Today I Met The Girl I'm Going To M... - Chapter 37: Chapter 37

It's really quiet in the car.
Like super quiet.
Except for the music playing that is.
But other than that hardly any conversation has taken place between Jennie and me since we left the view of L.A. I showed her.
I'm worried.
I'm worried because I know from recent experience how unnerving it is to share a part of you that you aren't proud of.
I'm worried that Jennie doesn't believe me when I said that knowing about her past hasn't changed my opinion of her.
I'm worried that I'm not able to make her feel secure like she did for me.
Jennie knew exactly what to say and how to act after I opened up and maybe I'm not doing that for her.
Maybe I'm not able to give her the sense of peace that she gave me.
I'm worried.
She gave me perfection in her response and I don't know that I've returned the favor.
All I want is for Jennie to take from me what I took from her.
Reassured and comforted.
That's what Jennie made me feel, and that's what I hope and pray she feels now.
I don't think she does though.
She's still holding my hand but her eyes seem to be looking anywhere but at me.
Damn.
There I go again.
Me.
Me.
Me.
I have to stop thinking this way.
Enough about me, I need to focus on Jennie .
"Are you ok?" I ask as we stop at a red light.
Jennie looks at me and her eyes are a bit glazed over. "Sorry, what did you say?"
"Are you ok?" I repeat as I try not to read too much into the fact that she seems to be off in her own world.
"Yeah, I'm good," Jennie replies unconvincingly.
I don't want to push her but at the same time I don't want her cover up her feelings. "You sure? Because if you're not up to going anywhere else..."
"I'm fine, Jisoo," Jennie assures me before I can finish. "It's just, you know, I uh..."
I tug on her hand as I give her an understanding smile.
I do know.
She probably feels really vulnerable and I totally get where she's coming from.
"You don't have to explain yourself to me; I just wanted to make sure," I say softly.
"You could make me feel better by telling me where we're going," Jennie requests with a genuine smile.
" Jennie!" I exclaim. "That's not really fair you know."
"I know," she chuckles. "It was worth a shot though."
My response to her is cut short by some asshole in the car behind me. "The light is fucking green, lady, fucking go!" he shouts as he honks his horn furiously.
"Fuck you!" I shout back making Jennie laugh even harder. "What a fucking jerk," I complain as I step on the gas. "Some people have no patience when they're driving."
What?
I'm not like that all the time.
Whatever.
As we approach our next destination I start to relax. Jennie has been more talkative and she seems to be back to her normal self.
We're about ten minutes away from the park and I hope she's willing to go along with my plan. "Hey, Jen, I need you to do something for me."
"What's that?" Jennie asks as her fingers continue to slide in and out of mine.
"I need you to close your eyes," I explain. "And you have to promise me that you won't open them until I tell you to."
"No fair," she pouts.
"Life isn't fair," I tease. "Come on, do it for me, please." I turn and give her my best pout, along with a head tilt.
Ha!
Turnabout is fair play Ms. Jennie Kim.
"Damn," she mutters under her breath. "Fine but just so you know, I'm not usually this much of a pushover."
I grin widely at her and she rolls her eyes back at me, but she eventually closes them.
I pull into the parking lot minutes later and I am getting really excited.
I've been to Disneyland a ton of times but going with Jennie, I'm sure, will be my best visit to date.
Once I turn off the ignition, I make sure Jennie isn't cheating by trying to sneak a peek. She's being good, so I exit the car to get my surprise out of my trunk. "Just a second," I say when Jennie starts complaining again.
She is being so darn cute right now.
I lock my purse up, the essentials of what I need and my digital camera.
I plan for there to be nothing in my hand in case Jennie feels the need at some point to like holding it.
Always be prepared.
It's my motto.
Well that and 'Hakuna Matata'.
It means no worries, for the rest of your days...
I'm sure you've all seen the movie so I don't need to go on.
Right, where was I again?
Oh yeah, surprising Jennie.
I have to stop myself from giggling because I'm dying to see her reaction to this part of the Jisoo Kim tour.
I was only kidding when I told Jennie I was going to charge her two hundred dollars. Instead, I've decided her payment will be a plethora of hot kisses like we shared the other day.
I think that's a brilliant form of payment.
Who's with me?
"Are you planning to show me where we are this century?" Jennie playfully whines while her eyes remain firmly shut.
"Keep your pants on," I fire back.
Actually, I would rather you didn't.
I adjust the hat on my head and get into position.
"You can open now," I tell Ms. Pouty and she does. "Welcome to the Magic Kingdom." I strike a pose while grinning at my shocked companion for the day.
Jennie's eyes immediately light up. "Are you serious?" She squeals with excitement as she looks around the parking lot. "Oh my god, you are serious."
My heart jumps for joy at how Jennie's demeanor has completely changed from a few minutes ago.
This is definitely a Kodak moment.
I manage to snap a few pictures without her noticing.
"Oh my god, Jisoo," Jennie squeals again. "This is the best surprise ever!" She leaps out of my car before running over to give me a very fierce hug.
Now I know why this is the happiest place on earth!
"I have another surprise for you," I inform Jennie once she lets go of me. I produce the Mickey ears I had custom made for her yesterday.
I have to remember to thank Rose for picking them up because I was too busy learning my song.
Jennie looks at me, then at my hand, and then back at me. "I'm not wearing that on my head, people have eyes you know."
"Now, now, don't be such a spoilsport," I tease as I hold Jennie firmly in place. "It's not like you'll be the only one. Besides, you wouldn't want to disappoint me now, would you?"
Jennie crosses her arms as she gives me a very stubborn look. "I don't think so."
I shove my camera in my pocket before adjusting my Minnie ears. "Please, Jennie, for me. Please." I lace my fingers together and then I give Jennie a head tilt to end all head tilts. "Please." I try one last time as I lean into her.
"Damn it," Jennie groans and I know I've already won. "Why are my ears Mickey and yours are Minnie?"
"Because the pink matches my pants," I explain matter-of-factly, color coordination is essential. I place the Mickey ears on top of Jennie's head and when I step back, I can't stop myself laughing.
They look so cute on her.
She's trying to act all nonchalant but I can tell she's secretly happy she's wearing them.
I pull my camera out of my pocket so I can capture what she looks like for all eternity.
"What do you think you're doing?" Jennie asks as I adjust the zoom so my picture will turn out just right.
"Say cheese," I reply, completely ignoring her question.
"No fucking way," Jennie snaps as she goes to take the Mickey ears off.
"You can't use language like that here," I gasp. "Now be a good girl and say cheese for me."
Holy shit, I'm having so much fun.
Jennie is acting like a child who isn't getting their way and I find it hilarious.
She glares at me.
I just smile at her as I wait for her hissy fit to be over.
"Say cheese," I repeat.
"I hate you so much right now," Jennie whines but she does pose like I asked her to.
"No, you don't," I retort right before I snap a few shots. "You love me."
Right?
Bueller?
Anyone?
"Ok, you've had your fun, it's my turn," Jennie announces and then she grabs the camera out of my hand.
I gladly pose for a few shots-much to Jennie's dismay.
"You ready to turn that frown upside down?" I pinch Jennie's cheek and she's trying so hard not to smile. "Come on, you know you want to." I pinch her cheek again and I'm rewarded with a nosy crinkle smile that makes me so happy.
Jennie pushes me away from her. "Stop it."
Aw, she's hilarious when she's pretending to be upset.
"Only if you stop being a grouch," I tease.
Jennie sighs. "Fine, if you insist."
We head towards the gate and when I glance at Jennie, I see anticipation written all over her face.
I pull out the two passes I already bought and then Jennie does the unthinkable.
She tries to pay me for them.
"Absolutely not," I firmly tell her. "I invited you, so this day is on me."
"I can't let you do that," Jennie replies as she tries to shove some money in my pocket.
That tickles.
And it feels good.
But I refuse to give in.
"Don't even bother Jen, you don't stand a chance of winning," I say as we walk through the turnstile.
Just like you don't stand a chance of resisting my feminine whiles.
I expect Jennie to continue trying to give me money.
But that doesn't happen.
Instead she does something so out of character for her. And let me tell you if I didn't see it for myself, I wouldn't have believed it.
"No way," Jennie exclaims. "No way." I'm pretty lost as to what she is referring to. "No way!"
I don't even have a chance to ask her what is going on because she runs right up to someone in a Donald Duck costume.
"I loved you so much as a kid," Jennie tells Donald, and whoever is inside waves back at her. "Oh my god, this is so cool." She turns around to look for me. "Jisoo, come here, come here, I want you to take my picture."
I guess someone lost their camera shyness.
She throws her arms around Donald Duck and waits for me to get the shot set up.
Jennie makes me take ten shots before she lets poor Donald go.
She waves enthusiastically to him as he walks away and I'm still not convinced that happened.
I expected Jennie to have a good time, but I never expected her to act like this.
And I love it.
I love how much she's enjoying herself and we've only been inside the park for five minutes.
I love how she keeps looking around like she can't quite believe she's at Disneyland.
I love how I'm getting to share this experience with her.
I love how she keeps pointing things out to me like I can't see them for myself.
I love that she's so carefree and despite her protest over the Mickey ears, it's clear she doesn't really care that she has them on.
I love everything about this day so far.
I love her.
I do.
Oh my god!
I can't believe I just said that in my head.
But I feel it.
I've felt it for a while now.
I honestly never believed in love at first sight and anyone whoever told me that they felt that way got a mighty laugh out of me.
I also used to laugh at people when they'd tell me that you just know when you've met the right person for you.
That you'll immediately feel a spark.
That you'll immediately feel a connection to.
That you'll just know in your gut.
In Jennie's case, I've had all of that happen.
I look at her differently now.
With a different set of eyes.
A set of eyes that sees not with my head, but with my heart.
I love Jennie.
I'm in love with Jennie.
I've known her for two weeks and I can say that with such authority.
And even if she's not there right now, even if she's just on her way to feeling what I'm feeling that's ok.
Because I'm confident, that one day, she'll be exactly where I am.
Head over heels in love.
With me.
I don't feel weighed down by my realization.
I feel exhilarated.
I feel exuberant.
I feel like I could fly.
And whatever other corny or clichéd way there is to feel about being in love.
I love Jennie Kim with my whole heart.
All of it.
I know it's going to be so fantastically amazing when I hear those words said to me from her.
Hopefully soon.
And hopefully I can control myself until that day.
I have faith in myself though.
I also faith that when the time is right, when the starts are aligned and when the moment is supposed to happen it will.
Until then, I plan on enjoying every single second I get to spend with her.
And there's no better time like the present.
"Did you see that?" Jennie asks as she walks over to me. "That was Donald Duck. And I got my picture taken with him. This is so awesome!"
"Well I'm glad you are getting into the spirit of things," I reply as I take the map of Disneyland they give you at the gate out. "Now, we need to set our priorities for the day. First we have to pick which rides we want to go on. Then we need to see which ones we can Fastpass so we're not stuck in too many lines. I myself like any kind of ride..." I glance up at Jennie and she has this weird look on her face. "What?"
"I never knew you were so organized." Is that an insult? "Not that being organized is a bad thing." Oh good, she's not insulting me. "Why can't we just walk around and pick whichever rides we want to go on?"
It's not like I'm that anal.
I'm just efficient.
I shrug. "We can, but I just want to make sure you get to see everything you want to see. Plus there are other places I want to take you to."
"Can I be honest?" Jennie asks and I nod. "I appreciate all the effort you've put into planning everything, but I'd like to take my time here, enjoy the moment and not rush around."
Jennie looks a bit scared that I might get mad.
How can anyone get mad at a face like hers?
It's not possible.
"Hey, this is your day, so whatever you want, you shall get," I pledge as I fold the map back up.
Jennie tips her Mickey hat so it's sitting crooked on her head. "I want to spend my day with you, that's what I want."
"Your wish is my command," I joke to cover up just how much she's making me swoon.
"Perfect," Jennie says shyly as she links arms with me. "Absolutely perfect."