Two Sides of The Moon - Chapter 22: Chapter 22

-Jack-
I ran through the forests, suffocating from fear. Hundreds and hundreds of shadows were after me. My hands were soaked in blood, and I didn't need to know whose blood it was. It was always Arch's. The shadows were gaining up on me... I couldn't run fast enough. I wasn't even running. The snow was pulling me in like a quicksand.
When the snow reached to my chest, a splatter of blood landed right in front of me. I stopped struggling and looked up.
I wanted to vomit.
What had I done to my mate...?
"You said you love me..." he spoke in a whisper, gurgling...
What had I done...? The ground around him turned red.
"Please make this stop..." I whispered, closing my eyes, but I could still see him. I could still smell him.
A loud growl wiped it all away. I still didn't want to open my eyes. I had no strength left to see my mate. I just wanted to die to get rid of these nightmares...
Something grabbed my arm, and my eyes flung open with a surprised gasp. The big, gray wolf was there, his teeth around my wrist as he pulled me out of the snow. The snow was white again.
But this time, it wasn't just me and the wolf.
Arch stood behind him, not a single scratch on his body. He smiled at me. I had never seen anyone smile at me with such warmth in their eyes... Then he came to kneel down in front of me.
"These nightmares will be over soon," he spoke softly. "I need you to stay strong for me a little while longer, okay? Don't let them take you."
For a second, I forgot this was just a dream. I nodded.
"I'll try... But..."
"You would never hurt me," Arch said. "Never."
He was right. I would never hurt him. I'd do anything to protect him. I'd do anything to make sure no one laid a finger on him.
His smile grew wider. "I know," he whispered. "Do you like the cookies? I want to bring you more today."
"They're good," I said, not really interested in the cookies – I just wanted to watch him, his beautiful features, and gentle eyes.
"Then I'll bring you more today," he said, and by the time he spoke the last word, I was already awake, staring at my ceiling.
It was still pretty early, so I stayed in bed, under the warm covers. I wasn't actually cold. I felt warm. Peaceful. Arch's words still echoed in my head. His smile had made me warm.
But I was a little sad, too, because it was just a dream.
I got out of bed much later. I was still thinking about Arch while I washed myself and ate breakfast. I didn't have much else to do, and for some reason, thinking about him didn't feel so... bad. Normally the infestation would start moving inside me, but now they stayed pretty silent.
Then something occurred to me... The wolf. I felt stupid for not giving it a second thought until now. He was able to stop my nightmares. Nothing had ever stopped them before. I had never been able to stop the nightmares. Was he just my own imagination?
Or something else...
I let my gaze travel around my little home, trying to see or feel anything out of the ordinary, but couldn't. With a sigh, I continued eating.
"I swear to... Look at me, I almost said god," I spoke. "If there's a spirit watching me, I'd appreciate it if you showed yourself."
For a moment... I could've sworn I heard an amused chuckle.
Maybe it was just my imagination, but with these gods and spirits all hanging around... I wasn't sure how to feel. I'd been possessed for months, and if there really was a spirit messing with me... Were they able to interact with us in our dreams? Selene had pulled Oliver into the spirit realm through his dreams.
Could it be...?
"Are you a god?" I asked, but since no one replied to me, I started feeling stupid. "I'm going crazy, aren't I...?"
A second later, I could smell Aurora. I leaned toward the window and saw her walking down the pathway to my gate. She wasn't bringing me anything, so I wondered what she wanted from me. Maybe she had news about the renovation? When she started climbing the steps up to my porch, I stood up and went to let her in.
"Good morning," she said with a bright smile, but she quickly noticed my mood. "Is everything all right?"
"I think you guys gave me a haunted home," I told her. "I'm not sure, but I feel like I'm being watched. By a spirit. Or a god, who knows. Or I'm just going crazy."
"A spirit? But they're on our side," Aurora said, looking alerted. "Why would they be bothering you? They know to give you space."
I shrugged. "It's fine, I suppose," I sighed, glancing over my shoulder. "Like I said, it may be just my imagination."
"I can ask for a Spirit Walker to come have a look?" Aurora suggested.
"Nah, it's fine. I'll tell you if I actually find any proof there is one. Why are you here?" I asked to change the subject.
"I..." she mumbled, still peering at my home. "You said you needed a job..."
"I did, yes," I said, forgetting the spirit. "Do you have something for me?"
"I..."
"Aurora."
She turned to look at me. "I do, yes."
"What is it?"
She smiled at me. "As you know, we are expanding our territory rapidly, and it so happens we are soon going to need several new houses, since your pack can move out of the shelter soon. I was wondering if you'd like to be part of building your new territory?"
I stopped to stare at her. I didn't know how I was feeling, but the word, yes, wasn't the first thing that came to my mind.
I think she could see that.
"I understand if you don't want to," she said reassuringly. "I do have something else as well."
"What is that?"
"A good friend of mine is expecting a baby, and she could use help around her farm – she's raising chickens and sheep."
Chickens...
"I..." I stepped away from her and went to sit down in my living room.
She closed the door and followed me, taking a seat at the other end of the couch. She stayed silent, and I could feel her worried gaze on me.
"I want to help my pack," I murmured. "But... I haven't even seen them in a while."
"They speak highly of you," Aurora said quietly. "I'm sure they'd be happy to have you back with them."
I let out a deep breath, trying to calm down and make sense of my feelings. "I know what they expect of me."
"They don't expect anything from you. Rai and Pierce are happy to stay in charge, no matter how much time you need. And they are willing to continue as the leaders if you decide not to."
"I'm not a leader," I muttered. "I can barely take care of myself."
"You are not well, Jack. That has nothing to do with your leader skills," Aurora said.
"I'm not a leader," I repeated.
"That is up to you to decide," she said. "But how about a builder?"
I turned to look at her, and she smiled at me. "I don't think I'm strong enough..."
"There are many things to do that don't require strength," she said.
I turned to look at my home. I was interested, but I'd have to be close to my pack, and I wasn't sure if I was ready to face them just yet.
"What kind of help does your friend need?" I asked.
"She has a lot of animals to be taken care of," Aurora said without skipping a beat. "Feeding them, tending for injuries, collecting eggs and sheering, stuff like that."
"Maybe I could give it a try?" I said.
She nodded with a smile. "She'd be grateful for your help. She can only pay five dollars an hour, though."
"I'll take it," I said without hesitation. "Does Rayleigh expect me to start paying rent or taxes or...?"
"O, no, no, no, no – of course not," she said. "We don't have stuff like that here."
I nodded. "Then five bucks an hour is enough for me."
"Would you like to come meet her?" she asked. "She can explain more about the job."
I hesitated for a moment, but I had absolutely nothing else to do, so I nodded.
We stepped out of my home a short moment later. I felt nervous, but it wasn't enough to make me want to turn back. I guess it was easier to go meet new people with the Huntress herself by my side. And I really needed the job.
And that thought made me nervous about another thing. What if she saw me and decided she didn't want to have anything to do with me, the bastard son of Thorn?
"You... did tell her who I am?" I asked, hating how timid my voice was.
"I did, yes," Aurora said, glancing at me. "I wouldn't put you in a situation like that."
"Like what?" I tried asking as nonchalantly as I could.
"I know there are people who are still wary of you. I wouldn't make you meet those people. Hell, I don't want to meet those people unless they pull their heads out of their asses."
A chuckle escaped my lips, and he laughed lightly. "I don't blame them. Everyone is scared right now. I'd be wary of myself as well."
"You are a good person, Jack. You don't deserve to be treated like you're not," she said sternly.
"Oliver explained it to me. Not everyone is used to spirits and shadows. They are afraid of the unknown, and I get that. All they can do is trust a bunch of strangers that say I'm harmless, while I haven't even left my cabin. How can they trust me if they haven't even met me?"
She was silent for a while after I stopped speaking, glancing at me a few times.
"Wise words," she finally said, looking like she wanted to add something, but then she looked ahead of us. "You don't need to worry about Ina. She already knows you are harmless. She got possessed during the battle, and though it lasted only for a few hours, she knows what it's like. She knows you had no control over anything that shadow made you do."
"And I know even those two hours were pure hell for her," I spoke quietly.
"She is still shaken, yes," Aurora said just as quietly.
One thing that I was already pleased of was that Ina's farm was further away from the town, and pretty close to my home. It would be easy to get to her place without having to meet with a lot of people on my way there. And it was close to the lake.
Her farm was actually very cute. I had passed it by several times during my runs, and I did like the place.
The barn itself was a small, red building with white fences surrounding it. The pasture was big, reaching almost all the way to the lake. The chickens had their own big area between the barn and Ina's house, and it was tightly fenced off from all kinds of intruders from foxes to hawks.
"How long will it take before I lose either the sheep or the chickens?" I muttered.
Aurora chuckled at my words. "You'll do fine. Just follow her instructions and don't leave the gates open."
"Sounds easy enough..."
She brushed my shoulder lightly. "You'll do just fine."
After we stepped into the yard, a tall woman stepped out of the house, waving at us with a smile on her face.
"Hello!"
"Hey, Ina!" Aurora waved back at her. "I brought you a new helper!"
"I can see that," Ina smiled, waiting for us on her porch. She already had an impressive belly, and moving around seemed hard for her. I understood perfectly why she needed help.
"How are you?"
I tuned out for a bit while the two women exchanged their hellos. I looked over the farm, and I really enjoyed the peace. I saw no one else around, only a bunch of sheep and chickens enjoying the warm day out now that the snow was melting fast.
"So, Aura said you're looking for work?" Ina spoke, and I turned to look back at her.
"Yes, ma'am."
"Oh, no, no, no, not a ma'am," she chuckled. "You can call me Ina. Have you ever worked with farm animals before?"
"No," I said, feeling nervous again as she watched me closely.
"It's easy, don't worry," she said. "Come – I'll show you around."
As we walked around the farm, she told me more about the job. It was pretty much what Aurora had already told me, and it did sound simple enough for me. I was pretty sure I could do it. And I liked the fact that I didn't have to interact with other people that much. The only times I'd probably have to deal with people was when they came to pick up the wool or the eggs, but Ina said she'd usually do it herself.
I had the feeling Aurora had already told her I wasn't ready to be with people yet. She made such a big deal out of making sure I knew that wasn't a requirement. I was happy about that. I did feel a bit nervous around Ina, but that was quickly fading during our walk around her farm. She seemed like a nice person, just like Aurora.
"My mate is one of the guards, so he can't really help around," Ina explained while we were making our way back to her house. "He would love to, but with how things are..." she trailed off, glancing at the sky, like making sure there were no shadows approaching us.
"I get it. I don't really have anything to do, and I need money to renovate my home, so I'm happy to be of use," I told her.
"We are not making you pay for the extension," Aurora said sternly, but I ignored her.
"I'm available anytime," I told Ina, who gave me a grateful smile.
"How about tomorrow morning?" she asked, and I nodded. "I'll feed the animals myself, but if you'll come around ten, I can show you the feeding schedules and how to use sheers."
"I'll be here," I promised.
Aurora walked me back to my cabin, and my mood couldn't have been better. I was finally being useful! I finally had something to do in this territory. And I was finally going to earn some cash. I knew they'd refuse to take a penny for the renovation, but I needed it for other things as well.
"I'll come check up on you tomorrow," Aurora told me when it was her time to leave. "I want to see how you're doing in your first job!"
"You don't have to..." I muttered, but she just waved her hand.
"I will respect it if you tell me to stay away, but... I kind of want to see how things are going," she spoke.
"Fine," I breathed out, and her smile grew wider. "I'll try not to fail you."
She inhaled sharply and stopped to stare at me. "Oh, honey – you could never fail me," she spoke softly. "You will do great – I know it."
I wished I had her confidence, but to be honest, I was feeling a little confident. The work didn't require strength or a big brain, so as long as I remembered to keep the gates closed, I was probably going to be just fine.
After she left, I tried to keep myself busy by cooking, eating and then by reading a book. I was thinking about going for a run, but before I could make that decision, I heard footsteps approaching my door.
I sat up on my couch when his scent filled my senses.
Arch.
"Hi... I... I brought you more cookies."
I froze in my seat when I remembered the dream. It was just a coincidence, right? There was no way he had actually been in my dream, right?
"I, uh... I won't bother you longer... I just... I wanted to see how you're doing."
Why wouldn't he just leave me alone...? I wanted to go tell him to piss off already, but at the same time... I hesitated for a moment, and then slowly got up from my seat. I tried to tell myself I still wasn't strong enough, but...
I still opened the door.
He smiled at me, looking as gorgeous as ever as he stood a few feet away from my steps. He had the bag of cookies in his hands.
"Hi," he said carefully.
I was going to tell him to leave me alone, but instead...
"Hello."
His smile grew bigger. "How... are you doing?" he asked, and I shrugged. "That's... good?"
"I suppose," I said.
What the fuck was I doing?
"I brought you cookies," he said.
"Yeah, I heard you..." I muttered, feeling awkward as hell, but... that's about it. Our eyes met, and I... didn't feel bad.
"I can bring you something else, too," he said. "Just name it."
"Stop," I said quietly, and his smile started to fade. "I know you feel bad for what happened. You don't have to. I made my choice. You didn't know. So... you don't have to feel guilty."
"That's..." he paused for a moment. "That's not why I'm here."
"Then why are you here?"
"Because I want to get to know you," he said. "I want to..."
"You don't know what you want," I said when he didn't continue.
He let out a deep sigh and shrugged. "I do feel bad for what happened, and for not feeling the connection with you, but that's not why I'm here."
"You could just let it go," I suggested, leaning against the wall next to my door. "You could stop coming here. I wouldn't blame you. I'm not angry at you. I don't hate you. It's not your fault that I'm not your mate. Nothing is your fault, we just... We don't click."
No matter how much it hurt to speak those words, they were still true.
"Jack..." he spoke my name so softly I wanted to chase him away from my yard so I wouldn't have to feel that pain ever again. "You gave the last of your life to save mine. How am I supposed to just stop coming here?"
"Like I said, you don't need to feel guilty."
"It's not guilt," he said. "It's..." he paused again and shook his head. "I can't stop thinking about what I'm missing out on."
"You mean...?"
"Why would I walk away from a guy with a good heart without even trying to get to know him better?" he asked, taking a step closer to me. "The reason I want to get to know you isn't because I want to see if there's a possibility I could feel the connection with you. I want to get to know you because I'm a gay guy who can't stop thinking about you."
Now I was at a loss for words. "I... So you... I mean..."
"So... yeah..." he mumbled, and blushed lightly. "I brought you some cookies."
"Oh... Thanks," I said, feeling the color rising up on my cheeks as well.
"I know you still need time, so I'll get out of your hair now, but... I really want to spend time with you because of you, not because of guilt or connection or anything like that. I just... Want to know you," he told me.
I nodded because I still didn't know how to speak human languages at that moment.
"So... Here?" he said, walking up the stairs to give me the cookies.
"Thank you," I said, taking the bag from him.
"I'll see you soon," he said, flashing a careful smile at me.
I nodded again.