Tyed - Chapter 11: Chapter 11

Twenty minutes later, Tyler and Colby are sitting in a somewhat busy but still relatively quiet restaurant. Tyler has a burger and a glass of red wine in front of him, and Colby's got a lost look in his eyes, staring at the wine for a moment before snapping out of it and looking at Tyler.
"I want to hear your story first," he says, just as Tyler takes a bite of his burger. It's sure a fancy burger, but Tyler almost drops it and ruins it. He's not sure why he's surprised at all. It was an expected question, he just doesn't want to talk about it.
He figures he has to get it out of the way, though. He obviously can't avoid it forever, and it's definitely easier to admit to the bare minimum truth now than it would be to dodge and avoid any longer. He doesn't have to get into it.
"You ever heard of Darkfilly Copse?" Tyler asks after he finishes his bite. Colby regards him for a moment, and Tyler takes a long sip of wine as he waits for the answer.
"Not until tonight," Colby answers. "They spoke about it like it was something we all already knew, however. I gathered it has to do with child abuse?"
"It's like... I don't know if it was a cult, or it used to be or what." Tyler can talk about those aspects so easily. "But it was this tiny town out in the north-east Victoria in among all the mountains. It was super religious and there was a bunch of child abuse going on. Eventually all the child abusing got discovered by someone who could do something about it and the police came and broke it up and resettled everyone. Me and my brother- that was my brother they spoke about- grew up there."
It's easy to give him that much information, even though it does stir up a little bit of fear. He sits incredibly still, unnaturally still, as he waits for Colby's judgement. It's not like he'd judge Tyler's actions or morality, but he will decide how differently he's going to treat Tyler from this point on, and Tyler would prefer if he pretended he hadn't heard it. He doesn't want to be pitied.
Colby's non-reaction is practised, but definitely put on. Tyler can't tell what he feels underneath it, though. "I can see how you felt I took you there deliberately," Colby says, voice even. "I swear I didn't know."
"I know." Tyler shrugs. "But it's your turn to spill."
"To spi-" Colby pauses as he parses what Tyler said. He looks grim. "Would it be enough to say it's sad?"
Tyler sits back in his seat. He's in no position to make demands. "You don't have to talk about it, but I'd like to know." All he can think about is the forest outside Darkfilly Copse and how lonely it was out there. This conversation is terribly stiff as it is, but Tyler's thirst for knowledge overrides that. He crosses his arms over his chest to lock in what little heat he has.
Colby sighs. He crosses his arms too, and everything about this feels horrible. Tyler went into this whole thing based on necessity first, and lust second. Maybe he should just drop it.
He doesn't get a chance to suggest this before Colby starts talking, and Tyler sits back and lets him go. "I was married," he says, and that's the last thing Tyler expects; he clutches at his arm, trying to give himself stability. He tries not to let any expression show on his face.
"Was," Colby repeats, like that's what he fears Tyler's worried about. Tyler doesn't really care whether or not Colby is cheating, and from his actions earlier Tyler knows he's against that. "Part of why we split up was that she cheated on me."
"How long ago was this?" Tyler asks, nervous. He doesn't particularly want to be the rebound, but he can live with it if he is- he just wants to know before he gets too attached. Beyond that, though, there's also the concern that she's still around.
"Two years ago, we separated. The divorce was finalised early last year. You don't have to worry about that," Colby says softly, and Tyler lets out the tiniest sigh of relief. "I sometimes still invited her to things when nobody else would come with me, but now I clearly don't have to do that anymore, thankfully. Our relationship... Things were bad before she went and did what she did."
"In what way?" Tyler leans across the table, watching Colby carefully. Colby looks everywhere but at Tyler for a moment, examining the walls before finally, suddenly fixating on Tyler.
"We had a son," he admits, "briefly."
"Oh." Tyler sits back and bites his lip. He has no idea what to say to that. "I get it- you don't have to say any more."
"Sudden infant death syndrome," is all Colby says, and when Tyler looks at his eyes the vulnerability there shocks him. This all feels too real all of a sudden. "His name was Altan."
Tyler closes his eyes, and he's reminded of his cousin's funeral, held in the middle of winter while it rained and cold dripped down Tyler's back. When his mother reached out and grabbed his hand, it felt like a beacon of warmth in the cold, bleak world.
So Tyler reaches out and takes Colby's hand across the table. Colby doesn't look up to meet his eyes. Tyler doesn't say anything, and neither does Colby. Neither knows what to say.
"I'm sorry for asking," Tyler says after a moment. "You totally didn't have to-"
"It's good to talk about it," Colby interrupts him. "And I could say the same for you."
Tyler shrugs. "Can we... move on?"
Colby smiles lightly. Tyler's hand is still resting across his, but he turns his hand over so that they're properly holding hands. It's nice. "That sounds good," Colby says, and the cool attitude that Tyler's gotten from him all day has fallen, at least a little.
Colby asks him questions about uni, which Tyler finds much easier and simpler to answer than the questions Colby probably wants to ask. Slowly, Tyler can see his defences going back up, but Tyler doesn't quite feel locked out. Not yet. He asks Colby questions about what his days are like, and from there he gets an idea of how the man actually spends his time- or at least, he does the best he can to understand it. This is the guy who could just spend a year's rent for a four-bedroom in the city like it was nothing, for someone he'd known for less than twenty-four hours. His responsibilities and priorities were completely incomprehensible to Tyler.
Tyler still hasn't mentioned that rent thing, exactly. He doesn't know how to bring it up, if he should even bring it up at all. He's struggling to make sense of it; that's tens of thousands, just gone. Not only could Tyler just up and leave now that he's got what he wanted, but generally the whole point of being a sugar daddy is trading money for- well, sex. Something Colby has seemingly avoided.
Maybe he's just waiting for the right time. Tyler's going to try his best to make sure the right time is tonight.
He chooses not to bring up the rent. Instead, he leans across the table, making the best eyes he can. He's aware of how clumsy his demureness probably seems- it's put on, likely badly. "So, where are we going after this?"
Colby tilts his head sideways, and Tyler could swear he knows. "Home, I assume," he says lowly, and it tells Tyler exactly nothing. "It's too late to return to the fundraiser, so unless you have another idea..."
There's a twinge of annoyance at his vagueness, but Tyler does his best to suppress it. "Are you annoyed that we left? We didn't have to go just because of me."
"I'm not annoyed that we left." Colby's arms are crossed, and that cold yellow stare of his is difficult to meet right now. Instead, Tyler looks at the candle, its light dwindling as it meets the level of the wax. He clutches his arms as his hopes dwindle low in the light.
"So then." Tyler gives him another chance. He's only known Colby for a day, but he gets the impression that Colby is far more than smart enough to know what Tyler means. He chooses to give him the benefit of the doubt, though. "Where do you want us to go?"
Colby raises an eyebrow, but it's more of a non-reaction than anything. "I thought I was clear. I'm taking you home."
"Are you misunderstanding me or refusing to answer?" Tyler asks, unable to keep the frustration inside. He clutches at the sleeve of his jacket, searching Colby's face for an answer that isn't there.
Colby takes a moment to respond. When Tyler meets his eyes, it feels like he's standing up to him, almost. This feels like a ridiculous situation to be in. Why does it feel like he has to convince Colby to be interested?
Before Colby can get a word out, Tyler demands, "Is this about Darkfilly Copse?"
Colby responds to that immediately. "It's not about Darkfilly Copse." Almost too quick. "Listen, Tyler, is this really what you want? You don't want to take it slow, perhaps? You don't want to be romantic?"
"Oh, so it is about Darkfilly Copse." Tyler's trying not to raise his voice, but he's never, ever been good at anger management.
"It's not the whole reason, and is it really so wrong to be concerned that going as fast as you want might not be healthy for you?"
"I know what's healthy for me," Tyler lies, "and besides, you didn't want to do anything before you knew. So what's the other reason, Colby?"
Colby leans over the table quickly, and where his hand was gently resting over Tyler's, it suddenly presses hard into the table. His voice is dangerously low, like a bass line that Tyler can feel. "Do you ever stop talking?"
Tyler's face burns, and something stirs in his stomach, almost like sickness except light and airy and pleasant, tugging at him. Silenced, he sits back down, crossing his hands over his lap. His heart beats faster, and as he stares at Colby, he realises with abject horror that he found that really actually kind of hot.
"Sorry," he says, forgetting what he was even asking.
For a split second, Tyler sees Colby's emotions clear as day on his face. There's a moment of horror, similar to Tyler's own, and then he sits back down too and it's back to stone. "Just... let me just take you back to your apartment," Colby says, and when Tyler manages to gather himself enough to speak, he shakes his head.
"No, I want to know what the hell just happened," he says, and a grin catches him. "Do I just have to be enough of an asshole to get you to be into me?"
"I hope that's not seriously what you're taking from this," Colby answers, dry. "I wouldn't call it being an asshole."
"Just tell me what the problem is, and I'll drop it, alright? So it's partly that you're concerned I'm made of glass, but what was it before that?"
"I never said that," Colby argues, tapping his fingers on the table. Tyler waits for him to continue, but he doesn't.
"I know something's up," Tyler says, and Colby twitches, but it's not enough to draw a response just yet. "I know you fucked other people, so why not-"
"You want to be just like them?" Colby's voice is too low, too quiet for it to make sense. It's almost threatening, and it tugs at the same place low in Tyler's stomach. "I thought you wanted to be different."
"I do." Tyler bites back his anger. "I didn't realise different meant we wouldn't be having sex."
"It doesn't." Colby's vagueness is really starting to piss Tyler off, if it hadn't already. "I wanted some time to figure out how to approach it, that's all. Are you happy?"
"Not really, because I don't know what the fuck that means. How difficult can it be? We've got dicks to put inside each other, or whatever. Do you not have a dick? 'Cause that's fine too. What did you do with everyone else?"
Colby's empty, blank stare tells Tyler that he misspoke in some way or another, but it's difficult to figure out how. After a moment, Colby sits back. "How much did Lachlen tell you about the club, hmm?"
"I don't know, that it was the kind of place I might meet someone who was rich and queer and able to help me. I get that there was kind of a kinky thing going on, but I guess you'd expect that from any kind of club like that."
"Right." Colby closes his eyes for a minute and leans back against the seat, taking a sharp intake of breath. Tyler can see the gears turning in his head, even if he can't work out what's going on in there. "You want to do what I did with everyone else?"
"Yeah." Tyler doesn't get it, he really doesn't. It shouldn't be this difficult. "Is that so hard to understand?"
"I suppose it's easier to show you than to explain," Colby says, standing up. "Come on. You're coming home with me."
Tyler stands almost too quickly, but he's careful to hide his excitement. Looking at Colby, Tyler's suddenly taken aback by the way his eyes glow, like a hungry wolf seeing prey, and a small grin shows bright white teeth like that of a predator. He turns slightly and it's like Tyler was imagining it.
While Colby pays for their food, Tyler stands there playing with the sleeve of his jacket. He desperately wants to know what the hell is going through Colby's mind right now, but not as desperately as he wants to finally get this show on the god damn road.
It hasn't even been a full day since Tyler met Colby, but it feels like he's been wanting this forever.
"I'm trusting you to know yourself," Colby says to Tyler as they're walking to the car. "You've got to be honest with me, alright?"
Tyler wants to roll his eyes. He knows Colby's tip-toeing around him because of his past, but he really, seriously doesn't appreciate it. There's a few things that he can't stand, but just about all of them aren't going to happen.
"Let's get that out of the way now," Tyler suggests as he slides into the passenger seat. He feels so confident right now, sitting up straight next to the hot, rich maybe-boyfriend he's about to fuck, and he can state what he wants clearly and concisely. "I'm not going to call you daddy, and please don't get lovey-dovey on me, but beyond that I'm good, alright?"
Colby laughs lowly, knowingly. It's almost condescending, and it rubs Tyler the wrong way a bit, but it seems unintentional. "Neither of those will be a problem."
"Great." Tyler crosses his legs. "Then we're good."
Colby doesn't respond.
Tyler watches the city lights growing and the sunlight dimming as they drive. He doesn't recognise the part of the city that Colby's driving to, but he doesn't drive far. It's down back towards where his hotel is, but beyond that, through a nice suburb that Tyler's never had occasion to visit. He pulls into a parking spot, outside a three-story that nobody Tyler knows could ever afford, and for a second Tyler's looking around trying to figure out where they're going to before he remembers who he's with.
When Colby gets out of the car, Tyler follows, silent. He walks up to the door, confirming that it's his. Tyler looks up, and through the second story window he can see a dining room, and a balcony on the third level on which some plants sat.
"Nice house," Tyler says, swallowing back the sudden nerves that arise in his throat. He's about to ask if Colby lives alone, before remembering he's rich and divorced. Of course he lives alone.
For a moment, Tyler considers how nice it might be to move in with him. He catches himself; he's known Colby for a day. In fact, Colby paid his fucking rent, which would go to waste if Tyler moved in with him. As much as he wants to LARP being rich, he's not. He is, in fact, a jobless uni student who just happens to have struck it lucky with Colby.
"Thanks," Colby says emptily. His mind is clearly not on his house.
When Tyler steps in, he sees a hallway in front of him with stairs on one side, relatively sparsely decorated, although a few pictures can be seen. One is a painting of a waterfall that looks like it's somewhere in the rainforest, and that's what Tyler's eyes are drawn to more than anything. He walks over to take a look at it, eyeing up the leaves. There are specks of red and brown and gold in amongst all the green, like the sparks of a fire. He doesn't think of tropical rainforests as hot, but when he thinks about it, they are, despite all the resemblances to the freezing forests of Darkfilly Copse.
He shivers at the very thought, even though it's quite warm in here. Colby takes his jacket off and hangs it on a coathanger next to the door; the heat pushes Tyler to follow suit. Colby stretches his arms slightly, watching Tyler like he's observing an animal in the wild. Tyler's mouth is dry and he feels his heart picking up the pace. Colby rolls up the sleeves on his shirt and Tyler feels a physical response to that.
"This way," Colby says, pointing down the hallway. "Spare bedroom."
"Spare-" Tyler half-asks, but he doesn't get much time to question as Colby walks past him, leading the way. He opens the door and Tyler sees stairs beyond it anyway.
"Do you want to go up two flights?" Colby asks, but it's not really a question. Tyler can all of a sudden read his impatience, and now it feels like the tables have flipped. Tyler, smirking, dawdles after him.
Tyler doesn't look at his face, but when he passes through the door Colby's hand comes to rest between his shoulderblades. His fingers only slightly grip the back of Tyler's shirt, but all of a sudden Tyler gets the impression that he's entering the lion's den.
Colby closes the door, and although there's another door that appears to lead to a bathroom, Tyler ignores that. He walks up the stairs, and what he sees seems simple. There's a bed in the middle of the room, a queen or a king with thick black sheets, plenty of empty floorspace on the floorboards, and a cabinet painted black. Black curtains cover the windows, and there's a walk-in wardrobe, but other than that it's relatively barren.
Colby's following him up the whole way. "Listen to me," Colby says lowly as Tyler steps into the room. "I'm going to be very gentle with you, but you need to talk to me."
"I'm seriously fine," Tyler begins to argue, but he doesn't get far.
"I said listen to me." Colby's quiet command strikes a chord in Tyler that feels so, so strange. "Usually I would use safewords. Yellow means you want me to slow down, or calm down, and red means we have to stop entirely."
"Can't I just say that-" Tyler begins, but he feels the grip on his shirt suddenly tighten and instinctively shuts up. He holds his breath for whatever Colby will say next.
"Shut the fuck up and let me speak, Tyler." Tyler quivers oh so slightly. "You can just say that, hence why I say usually."
Colby steps in front of Tyler, taking his face between his hands. "Promise me you'll communicate with me."
"I will," Tyler says, searching his eyes for what all this could possibly mean. He supposes he's about to find out.
Colby reaches forward and kisses him, but it only lasts for a short moment before he pulls back and surveys Tyler. "Take off your shirt."