Tyed - Chapter 18: Chapter 18

Colby's strong arms around Tyler's shoulders feel pretty much like home, and Tyler's brain isn't exactly working right now. He just cuddles into Colby's touch. "Mm," he says, probably meaning to have said something, but no words came out.
Colby laughs lowly; Tyler's not sure where they're going, but they're going up stairs now. Tyler's not a particularly light person, mainly due to his height, and it only occurs to him as Colby almost runs into the wall that it must be at least a little bit difficult; Colby doesn't really seem to show it, though. Tyler knew Colby had muscles, but he didn't really process that that meant he was strong. Strong enough to carry Tyler up a flight of stairs like it was no problem.
"Are you alright, doll?" Colby asks quietly, but there's a note of humour in his tone.
"Mm," Tyler mutters, hiding his nose in Colby's neck. He smells so nice. "Mm, Master."
It vaguely processes somewhere in his head that he wouldn't normally say that, but right now he frankly doesn't care.
"I really fucked the brain out of you, huh?" Something about Colby's voice is so soothing to Tyler, no matter what he's saying; his tone is gentle, anyway. "Here."
Tyler's not really paying attention to where he is, but when he's laid on Colby's sheets, he immediately reaches out for Colby's touch, not really sure what he's grasping for. He catches Colby's hand, but as soon as he catches it he lets go almost out of instinct. He hasn't actually held someone's hand in...
A long time.
So instead, he rolls over and buries himself in the sheets, closing his eyes and just smelling Colby rather than having to interact with him. His brain cells are recollecting, pooling in the back of his head and realising he's in so much deeper than he thought he was prepared to be.
"You're going to get cum on the sheets," Colby says, somewhat amused, reminding Tyler that he's got cum all over his stomach, because of course he does. The worst part is he's still kind of horny; the long-lasting nature of that orgasm cancelled out its effectiveness as a release, in some weird and inexplicable way.
Colby sits on the bed, and Tyler sits up on his hands and knees to face him. Instead of saying anything, as he's starting to have to face the shame in the afterglow, he simply crawls over to kiss Colby, gently pushing him back against the bed.
Colby laughs lowly. "Are you that desperate? We haven't even had dinner yet." Something about the gentle implication in his words is sort of arousing and that only serves to make Tyler's whole situation worse; he's not sure his body can handle any more, yet it demands it. "I'd like to go out, if you would, otherwise..."
"Anything you like," Tyler says, in a weird in-between state where he mutters the title he's given Colby quietly after his words, unwilling to say it fully but still having it naturally follow. He leans his head down, saying, "just..."
The hand that grips his face, forcing him to look up at him, causes Tyler to gasp, and then he's right back in the state he was before, no hesitation. "What did you say, doll?" Colby asks innocently, and Tyler relents easily, lowering his eyes.
"Anything you like, Master," he says, as he reaches forward and runs his fingers up the length of Colby's dick. "Just... first, if you'll let me..."
---
A long time before then. That's not the last time Tyler held someone's hand, but it's something that sticks in his memory impossibly strong like no glue could ever hope to compare.
The boat, the failed escape, the fire. Trey was somewhere behind, Kali was somewhere ahead, and Tyler and Kevin were running for their lives, hand in hand. It was still only primary school, and nobody was yelling cooties about hand-holding yet, but it was still weird running through the woods holding Kevin's hand when Kevin was usually actually kind of mean to him. Somehow, that's what Tyler was thinking about at that exact moment, and not the fact that if they got caught they'd experience hell on earth long before they got sent to it for whatever they were eventually going to get sent to it for.
"Tyler! Hurry up!" Kevin pulls impatiently on Tyler's hand, causing him to stumble. "I can hear them!"
Tyler tries to look behind him, but he can't see anything. "What if-" he struggles to talk around his heavy breathing- "what if they're gone and it's just Trey? Trey-"
He starts to raise his voice, but Kevin cuts him off. "Shut up! Shut up or they'll hear you! Follow me," he says, and suddenly there's a sharp turn at a part of the forest Tyler doesn't recognise. There's a slope here, and the two boys half-run, half-stumble down it. It's mostly dead leaves that make up the ground, and Tyler ends up slipping, dragging Kevin down as the other boy's vice grip refuses to loosen and let Tyler fall alone.
"Ah-" Tyler bites his lip to keep from crying out as a few branches slice him, but ultimately, they land safely in a miniature ravine, carved out by the old path of a creek that no longer flows this way. Kevin's not satisfied with this hiding place, and he pulls Tyler to his feet, dragging him up before he's ready and before he can get his bearings. Kevin's dark orange hair is whipping around his face, and Tyler's lost in the rush of this. Are they going to get away, after all that? Are they going to escape, even if it's just the two of them? Maybe Kali and Trey will find their way out and the four of them are going to start again, as planned.
Maybe it'll just be Kevin and Tyler and they'll have to make it work. They could make it work.
"Kevin!" Tyler whisper-shouts. "Let's just hide and then wait for them to give up."
"That's what I'm tryna do," Kevin hisses, and suddenly Tyler's pulled into a grove of fallen trees, landing harder on the dead leaves of the forest floor than he expected. Kevin falls half across him, half beside him, and as Tyler tries to sit up he's shoved back against the ground, Kevin's hand over his mouth. "Shut up."
Tyler struggles against him for a minute, but Kevin just lightly hits him in his ribs, not intended to bruise or even hurt. He's not looking at Tyler, instead gazing up at the hill they fell from, staring intently. Tyler gives in, closing his eyes and listening, as Kevin's doing; he can hear a distant rustle of leaves, but the steps are so quick it sounds more like a child running than an adult chasing. They're fading as Tyler listens, and then all he can hear is the sound of wind, everything else fading into background noise. Except his heart, which is beating quite loudly.
Kevin's hand is still over his mouth, but Tyler grabs his wrist and gently moves it. After that moment of silence, Kevin seems a little softer, and he moves his hand, using it instead to hold himself above Tyler. He looks towards Tyler, meeting his eyes, and the green of the forest is reflected there and Tyler swallows, hard. Something about making eye contact with Kevin right now is unbearable, and Tyler forgot to let go of Kevin's wrist.
"Uh," Tyler panics. "My leg hurts."
"Oh." Kevin's voice is oddly soft as he shifts, and the pressure on Tyler lessens. "Sorry."
Tyler sits up, clutching at Kevin before realising he's being stupid and letting go. There's a fear that's dissipating, but as it does Tyler realises he doesn't know what to do. "Uh. Where do we go now?"
"We could stay here for a bit," Kevin suggests cautiously, and the thought causes Tyler's heart rate to spike again.
"What if they find us? And where do we go after that?" Tyler turns to Kevin for his answers. "Are we going to run away or are we going to go back?"
"I can't go back. I mean we can't go back." Kevin's voice shakes at the suggestion. "Tyler, we can't go back."
"Why not? We'll just say- uh-" Tyler struggles for a lie, having come up with lies time and time again to cover for Trey or Kali and always himself. "Some guy came to take us. Or we heard God, right? People say that in church all the time, that they do what God told them to do."
"I don't wanna go back."
Tyler meets Kevin's eyes and sees them filling with water, and for a second Tyler doesn't really believe what he's seeing. "I don't wanna go back," Kevin says, clutching onto Tyler's shoulders. He leans into the crook of Tyler's neck, and Tyler puts his arms around him without really thinking. "I don't want to. I hate it. I hate it and I'd go anywhere else but back there."
"Well, where can we go?" Tyler mutters, looking around. All he can hear now is birdsong and a distant crackling, rumbling kind of noise. He can smell smoke, but he can't see the fire yet.
"I don't know. We can walk to somewhere someone will find us, or something, I don't know. But let's go. Now? Please?"
And suddenly Kevin's scrambling to his feet, rushing when seconds ago he was crying in Tyler's neck. He brushes his tears away as Tyler's rushing to follow him, and as soon as Tyler's on his feet again, Kevin grabs his hand. This time, it's not because he has to to drag him; Tyler would've followed him anyway, and they're not running. Tyler takes his hand even though he doesn't have to.
"Do you know where you're going?" Tyler asks, and Kevin doesn't answer. So Tyler doesn't push for one; instead, he stays along for the ride as Kevin picks a direction and heads off in it. He wants to trust Kevin, and he has no other choice right now. He's not going to head out into the forest alone, although he only wonders where Kali and Trey are. He hopes they're okay.
"Should we look for Kali and Trey?" Tyler suggests, and is again ignored. He frowns, reaching up and hitting Kevin's shoulder gently. "Kevin. Should we look for Kali and Trey?"
"What? I dunno, we'll find them if we find them." Kevin seems distracted more than anything. He gives Tyler a sidelong glance, and Tyler doesn't really know what he's feeling right now, because everything's a mess, but he both really wants to be here running away and really wants to be hiding somewhere at home where nobody could find him.
They walk, mostly quietly, through the forest, listening out every moment for the sounds of other footsteps. No such sounds come. Every so often, Kevin changes direction, and Tyler doesn't ask why, nor does Kevin offer an explanation. It soon becomes apparent that there's a problem, however, when Kevin suddenly stops and Tyler nearly runs into him.
"What?"
"The fire."
Tyler can't see or hear any traces of the fire, although he knows there is one. "What about it?"
Kevin turns around to face him. "It's all around us."
"What do you mean?" That sounds bad, and Tyler finds it a little hard to breathe. Okay, now that he mentions it, he can smell smoke, but he still can't see anything.
"Can you hear that sorta distant roaring noise?" There's a heavy silence while Tyler listens; and yes, he can hear it, but his delay in answering is because of the intensity in Kevin's eyes that he can't seem to ignore.
"Yeah," Tyler breathes.
"That's the sound of the fire. And it's coming from every direction."
"What? How can you tell?" That's not how fire works, right? It can't just circle them like that? That's so badly what Tyler wants to believe, but Kevin is dead serious. Even if he's wrong- and can Tyler really consider that he might be, when he knows no better?- how are they going to be sure to avoid the fire?
"I hate my dad but he taught me about the woods and I know we can't avoid it." Kevin stops and steps in close to Tyler, too close. Tyler freezes, not knowing how to react. "I'm sorry, I don't-"
"Well then let's just go through it." Tyler suddenly takes the lead, pulling Kevin behind him. Kevin looks surprised but doesn't resist. "It can't be that hard, right? We'll just find a place it's not really burning and go through there."
"That's not how it works, Tyler-" Kevin tries to protest, but Tyler's not giving up. Not this time and not ever. He's going to try.
"Come on." Kevin's hand grips Tyler's with sure strength, trusting him. Tyler doesn't want to betray that trust.
It's longer than it feels like it should be before Tyler can actually see the fire. The smell comes first, stronger, and then the sound, and after that Tyler can see the first flickers of orange in the forest ahead.
He takes a deep breath, and the smell of smoke clogs up his nose, but he doesn't really mind. He slows, and Kevin almost walks into him, coming to stand beside him and observe the fire. It's a light flicker of flame across the dead leaves of the forest floor, gently climbing one of the gum trees to nestle in it's leaves; it looks so calm for what it is, as it devours the forest slowly and beautifully.
"Let's stay here," Kevin says, "until we find a way through."
"Yeah." Tyler breathes, pulling Kevin close to him. Together, they gaze at the fire, and for a moment, the future doesn't exist. It doesn't matter what happens next, not really, not right now. Tyler's holding Kevin's hand in the woods and they're free now, even if they won't be later. The fire gave them that freedom.
"I'm not afraid of fire," Kevin says, and Tyler doesn't know why he says it. "Not in hell and not on earth."
Tyler doesn't know if he believes it, but he answers, "me either."
Kevin takes a long, deep breath. "Let's go through it."
"Is it still burning on the other side?" This was Tyler's idea, and he thinks they can do it, but Kevin's just a little bit too hasty. Just a little bit too sure.
"I dunno," Kevin says. "Doesn't look like it. Do you want to go?"
Tyler stops, turning and looking Kevin in the eyes. He's asking him what he wants, not just making decisions, not just dragging him along. Maybe he didn't drag Tyler into leaving with him, but he drags Tyler along in almost everything. He won't force him through fire, though.
"Yeah," Tyler decides; he's already terrified, may as well use that energy to fuel his bravery. "Now."
He identifies a patch that looks already burnt behind the fire, where the fire is thin and low and burns only on the leaves. He leads Kevin there, and as the smoke begins to thread itself around his face, sneaking into his throat and lungs, he breathes it in and it's almost cleansing. He leaps, almost not seeing where he's going through the haze, and his feet land on something burning and Kevin's hand nearly slips from his grasp; but then his other foot finds safe footing on cool dirt, and a third step takes him onto cool ash over another burning piece of forest floor debris. It's barely out of winter, and the temperature isn't high enough for the flames to really catch more than a thin layer of dead leaves and branches. Three steps is enough to clear it and come out the other side, even with ash and smoke in your face and lungs. Tyler turns once he's on solid ground, and Kevin nearly runs into him, using him to get his own balance.
After a good few minutes of both coughing, Kevin grins. "We did it. We got through the fire!"
"Yeah!" Tyler grins, gripping Kevin's elbows. His heart is still racing. "Where to now?"
Kevin's gaze is distant for a moment, the gears in his brain turning as he realises Tyler's looking to him for direction, for him to make decisions. He opens his mouth but stutters to a stop. "Uh- let's- go, I guess, I-"
He stops talking suddenly and lunges at Tyler, almost shoving him back into the fire. For a moment, Tyler's terrified, fight-or-flight kicking in as he assumes Kevin's attacking him like he always used to and going to hit Kevin. But Kevin rolls away from him, and Tyler goes to ask him what the hell that was for when he hears the voices that Kevin noticed first.
"-far," he can just make out, a distant woman's voice. "Tyler? Tyler, are you out here?"
Tyler turns to Kevin and mouths, "it's my mum."
Kevin makes an annoyed face that Tyler can't quite interpret, and then puts a finger to his lips. Tyler listens, crossing his arms and biting his lip.
"Tyler, you're not in trouble." Tyler's mum's voice is sad and open. "I just want to make sure you're safe."
Tyler goes to sit up, and Kevin goes to grab his arm to stop him, but either way the rustling gets her attention, or maybe she would've seen them anyway- it's not clear. There's a laugh almost like relief, and then Tyler's being scooped up in arms he didn't ask to be scooped up in.
"Mum, put me down-" trying to speak aggravates Tyler's throat, and he coughs onto her shoulder. She does put him down, though- he's much too big for her to hold him for very long. "You gotta leave."
"What? No. Oh- Kevin, are you alright?" She goes to him and extends a hand. He looks at Tyler, distrust riddling every feature, and takes her hand to pull himself up. He says nothing, although there's something like indignation all over him.
"They're out looking for you guys, you know. Kali too." She doesn't let go of Kevin's hand when he tries to drop it, and she extends one to Tyler too. He tries to cross his arms, thinking only of how they could've escaped and started a better life, and she forcibly takes his wrist. He goes to complain, but she grips his wrist hard enough to make him squirm.
"Not Trey?" Kevin asks before Tyler's made the connection.
Tyler's mum takes a deep breath, hissing through her teeth. "They, uh. Already found Trey, darling, and they're blaming him for this."
"What's that mean?" Tyler asks as he's dragged back along a way that only his mum seems to know. "We all ran away."
"I don't know quite what's happening yet," she admits, "but from what I heard he said it was his idea to run away and he dragged you all along. There's no doubt you'll all be punished, but-"
"So why are you taking us back? Come with us!" Tyler interrupts, trying to plant his feet in the ground as if that would stop her. "You don't wanna be around Daddy any more than I do and you're an adult! You could take us out of here!"
"Oh, darling." She has the saddest smile on her face and it makes Tyler's heart hurt and it sucks. "We're never gonna get anywhere. Daddy's gonna find us, and even if he doesn't I don't have anywhere to go. You guys were gonna run off into the forest. Do you know how long it would've taken you to find civilisation? You would've frozen or starved to death. No."
"But you could come with us and then we won't," Tyler pouts without even thinking about it. "We'll go get Trey and we'll go again. There has to be a way out."
"Nora left," Kevin says softly, bitterness in his tone.
Tyler's mum shakes her head. "Maybe she did, Kevin, but we can't just up and do that. We would be needing a lot of help, and if we were going I don't want to leave no one behind."
"But you want to leave," Tyler says, searching for a yes. Confirmation that he's not insane, that his mother knows this is horrible, that a better life is out there, it has to be, Kevin's seen it and Kevin promised it to him and he felt it when he looked into Kevin's eyes.
"Yeah, if we could," she says, "but we can't."
Tyler had many punishments, eventually; he remembers being beaten, not being allowed to leave his room except for church for about three weeks, and not being allowed to see Kevin or Kali for three months.
He got off really, really light compared to Trey. Tyler can't remember exactly what happened to him, but he does remember that Trey was traumatised so badly he didn't speak again for almost two years.