Why the Straight One? - Chapter 59: Chapter 59
You are reading Why the Straight One? , Chapter 59: Chapter 59. Read more chapters of Why the Straight One? .
I hated leaving Alex, even for a minute, but with everything going on, I thought it was best to be around my brothers as well. It was dinner, and everyone, besides Alex, was seated at the table.
I was surprised to see Elliot there, seeing as he had been avoiding everyone as much as possible. It was strange to see him and Alan at the same table, but not even sharing a word or a glance. At least, Elliot never looked at him once. Alan was staring at him almost the whole meal, and I could see the pain in his eyes.
Raymond kept a close eye on him too, only looking away to talk to Cole a few times throughout the meal. Jay and Cam are with up as well, but I had a feeling, when they saw that I was down here, that they would rather have been eating it in Alex's room. Maybe next meal, if I wasn't there.
Not much was said during the meal, and Elliot kept his head bowed, barely touching the food in front of him. He probably wanted to be anywhere but here right now. Every loud sound brought his head up to look around the room for any sign of danger.
He needed help, that much was obvious. The problem was that I knew he didn't want to talk about anything. Maybe it was too soon to be pulling up everything, but he wasn't going to get better on his own.
I caught Raymond's eye, and understood the look there. It was on my mind too. I knew that in telling him about my past...I knew it would help, but knowing the right thing to do, and doing it, are two very different things.
For one, he probably doesn't want to talk to me since we've never been close, and secondly, it was hard. Harder then anyone would ever understand, to voluntarily talk about the lowest point of your life. But how was I to expect Elliot to talk when what happened to him had been so much worse, and was still happening only weeks before.
I tried not to watch him for too long. I think he felt eyes on him, and that made him nervous and uncomfortable. No wonder he didn't want to be around us.
I concentrated on my own dinner, and my thoughts of Alex, until I heard the sound of a chair being pulled back abruptly, and Elliot's angry voice.
"The fuck is wrong with you?"
It only took a second to take in the scene in front of me. The servant girl backing away from him, an empty bowl in her hand, the contents of which she must have spilled onto Elliot. I saw the look in his eyes. Fear, confusion, but most of all, anger. The pain from the hot soup seemed to have brought back memories of other pain he had experienced, and he was shaking with more then rage.
"I'm so sorry, Your Highness! Please, let me get a rag or something to clean this up." She took a hesitant step forward, and Elliot lurched back, almost tripping on his chair as he did so.
"Elliot." Raymond's voice was gentle, but firm, and Elliot's eyes instantly snapped towards him. He looked like a hunted animal, made desperate by his fear and confusion.
"It was just an accident."
Elliot was breathing deeply, looking uncertainly at the frightened girl next to him. She glanced over at me, as her employer, not knowing how to react to this kind of anger.
"It's alright, Emma. Like Raymond said, it was just an accident. You may go." I smiled at her, and she looked relived at my dismissal.
The door closed quietly behind her, and still Elliot stood as if rooted to the spot. It was hard to know just what was going on in his mind. He still looked angry, and I didn't know how to deal with that. It's not like anyone could, or wanted to be, that stern with him. I wasn't going to be angry at him for the way he treated my servant. I needed him to trust, not resent or even fear me.
No one said anything, because at that moment, the doors opened again, and this time a new servant entered, bowing.
"His Majesty, the King." He announced, and everyone instantly rose to their feet.
In stormed the king, and I thought I could just make out my mother who stayed back in the hall. He looked angry, and turned directly the face me.
"What the hell is going on here?"
"What do you mean?" I asked, feigning confusion, which only added to his anger.
"What do I mean?" His face was red with rage, and he had walked until he was standing directly in front of me. "Oh, I think you understand perfectly. Going to Jasper's kingdom, without my knowledge, assisting in civil war. Civil war! And then bringing home Elliot. Don't you understand how many things you just jeopardized? How much is at—"
"Look at your son." My interruption caught him off guard, and he stopped talking instantly. "Just look at your son and then tell me I shouldn't have brought him home."
He blinked quickly, turning his face to look at Elliot, who he had walked by without noticing at all. You didn't have to know what Elliot had gone through to see how changed he was. It wasn't just how thin and pale he was. It was his eyes. The king saw it all, understood more then could be told, and his whole face changed, anger wiped away.
"Elliot." His voice was unsteady, his face uncertain of how to approach his youngest child. I'd never seen him look so nervous in my entire life.
"You son of a bitch."
I glanced up in surprise at the harshness of Elliot's voice. I'd never heard him sound anywhere close to how angry he sounded now.
"Elliot, I—"
"You what? You're sorry?" He spat, and the king physically flinched at the strength of his anger.
"You sent me there! You sold me! All for the sake of your country's damn peace! And now that I'm finally away from him, you want me to go back. You come in here yelling at Thomas because he finally dragged me away from that monster. What kind of fucked up parent are you?"
His anger was reaching a peak now, and Raymond moves to stand behind him, careful not to touch him, but ready to pull him back if he needed to. He began to talk to him quietly, and little by little I saw Elliot's anger start to fade, replaced by the desire to be anywhere but here.
"Don't come near me. Don't you dare try to send me back, and don't try to apologize. Nothing you can say will ever repair the trust I had in you. No amount of explaining will make me forgive you. Thomas was right. Look at your son. Look at the mess he's become."
And with that he fled from the room, shoving past the guards who stood by the doors, not even noticing his weeping mother who stood in the hall. Raymond followed quickly after him, stopping the wrap his arms quickly around our mother.
There was a stunned silence, made more awkward by the presence of Jay, Cam and Alan, who had witnessed something perhaps only our family should have seen. Alan looked like he would have given the world to be in Raymond's place.
My father turned back to face me, and for the first time in my life, I saw tears in his eyes.
———————
"Hey, you're sitting up!" I had forced a smile before entering our room, but they joy at seeing him leaning against the headboard, was genuine.
"Barely." His laugh was breathy, the strain of sitting even for a short time, showing in his face.
"Yes, and only for a very short while." The nurse standing next to his bed reminded him, and he stuck out his tongue at her as soon as she turned her back.
"Yes, yes, you said that already." He sighed, his gaze following me as I moved to stand next to him.
"He really only should sit up for a minute or two more, Your Highness. He needs to take things slow. He was lucky none of his organs were seriously damaged, but the amount of blood vessels broken was rather serious, and isn't cured overnight."
"I understand, and I'll make sure he lays back down as soon as his time is up." I smiled reassuringly at her, and after she fussed around for a few seconds more, she seemed content to leave Alex in my care.
"I don't mind telling you that this is harder then it looks, and I don't even want to sit up for more then a minute. I just wanted you to see." His smile was slightly embarrassed, and I leaned forward to kiss his cheek.
"I'm so proud of you." I told him gently, and his face lit up.
"Good, then help me to lay down."
I laughed, but did as he asked, being as careful as possible as I helped him adjust. He looked almost too happy at the way I fussed around him, but at this point I didn't even care.
"You look tired." I must have spaced out while I was putting the blankets around him, because I'm sure my face showed the concern I had been trying to keep away from him.
"It's nothing, I—"
His hand gently cupped my cheek, and I was forced to look into his sincere blue eyes.
"Somethings bothering you and I want to know about it."
"You know me too well." I sighed and stood up. He smiled, but waited for me to continue.
I told him about everything that had happened at dinner. How my father had left only minutes after Elliot had stormed away. My mother's heartbroken tears and the way she looked after his retreating figure. I'd never forget the look in her eyes.
I didn't even realize I was pacing the whole time, until I had finished telling the story.
"I'm worried about him. I'm so worried. He's so full of hatred, and so broken. It's like he's getting worse everyday."
I glanced over at Alex, who was listening intently, eyes focused on my face.
"And it's not just that." I sighed, running a hand across my face.
"What is it, Tommy?" I looked up at his gentle tone, and met his concerned eyes.
"The last few nights...I didn't want to bother you when you need your sleep...I'm dreaming again." I stopped pacing, sitting on the edge of the bed near him. "And I'm so tired of him still having a hold on me."
I felt his hand rest gently on my back, and I sighed at his touch. Only months ago, I would have pulled away, but now I welcomed this gentle reassurance that he was there, and wasn't going to leave me.
"I want to get help. I want to find someone that I can talk to about this, and I want...I want to be free of him, once and for all."
I looked over at Alex, saw the tears in his eyes, and blinked back my own.
"And I know Elliot needs help. I can hardly expect him to listen to me about that if I haven't even tried it myself."
"Come lay next to me so I can hug you." Was his only reply, and I instantly obeyed.
He shifted so that he was laying on his side, and once his arms were around me, I let out the breath I hadn't noticed I was holding in.
"I don't know if I'm ready to just start talking to someone about it. I kept it a secret for so long. Do you...do you think I'm strong enough?" I couldn't meet his eyes, my own pulled down by the weight of all the years I had called myself weak for what I had allowed to happen to me.
"I've never met anyone as strong as you, Thomas."
I instantly looked up at him, and he pulled me into a deep, meaningful kiss. When he pulled away, he rested his forehead on mine, eyes looking directly into my own.
"I'm so proud of you."
I was surprised to see Elliot there, seeing as he had been avoiding everyone as much as possible. It was strange to see him and Alan at the same table, but not even sharing a word or a glance. At least, Elliot never looked at him once. Alan was staring at him almost the whole meal, and I could see the pain in his eyes.
Raymond kept a close eye on him too, only looking away to talk to Cole a few times throughout the meal. Jay and Cam are with up as well, but I had a feeling, when they saw that I was down here, that they would rather have been eating it in Alex's room. Maybe next meal, if I wasn't there.
Not much was said during the meal, and Elliot kept his head bowed, barely touching the food in front of him. He probably wanted to be anywhere but here right now. Every loud sound brought his head up to look around the room for any sign of danger.
He needed help, that much was obvious. The problem was that I knew he didn't want to talk about anything. Maybe it was too soon to be pulling up everything, but he wasn't going to get better on his own.
I caught Raymond's eye, and understood the look there. It was on my mind too. I knew that in telling him about my past...I knew it would help, but knowing the right thing to do, and doing it, are two very different things.
For one, he probably doesn't want to talk to me since we've never been close, and secondly, it was hard. Harder then anyone would ever understand, to voluntarily talk about the lowest point of your life. But how was I to expect Elliot to talk when what happened to him had been so much worse, and was still happening only weeks before.
I tried not to watch him for too long. I think he felt eyes on him, and that made him nervous and uncomfortable. No wonder he didn't want to be around us.
I concentrated on my own dinner, and my thoughts of Alex, until I heard the sound of a chair being pulled back abruptly, and Elliot's angry voice.
"The fuck is wrong with you?"
It only took a second to take in the scene in front of me. The servant girl backing away from him, an empty bowl in her hand, the contents of which she must have spilled onto Elliot. I saw the look in his eyes. Fear, confusion, but most of all, anger. The pain from the hot soup seemed to have brought back memories of other pain he had experienced, and he was shaking with more then rage.
"I'm so sorry, Your Highness! Please, let me get a rag or something to clean this up." She took a hesitant step forward, and Elliot lurched back, almost tripping on his chair as he did so.
"Elliot." Raymond's voice was gentle, but firm, and Elliot's eyes instantly snapped towards him. He looked like a hunted animal, made desperate by his fear and confusion.
"It was just an accident."
Elliot was breathing deeply, looking uncertainly at the frightened girl next to him. She glanced over at me, as her employer, not knowing how to react to this kind of anger.
"It's alright, Emma. Like Raymond said, it was just an accident. You may go." I smiled at her, and she looked relived at my dismissal.
The door closed quietly behind her, and still Elliot stood as if rooted to the spot. It was hard to know just what was going on in his mind. He still looked angry, and I didn't know how to deal with that. It's not like anyone could, or wanted to be, that stern with him. I wasn't going to be angry at him for the way he treated my servant. I needed him to trust, not resent or even fear me.
No one said anything, because at that moment, the doors opened again, and this time a new servant entered, bowing.
"His Majesty, the King." He announced, and everyone instantly rose to their feet.
In stormed the king, and I thought I could just make out my mother who stayed back in the hall. He looked angry, and turned directly the face me.
"What the hell is going on here?"
"What do you mean?" I asked, feigning confusion, which only added to his anger.
"What do I mean?" His face was red with rage, and he had walked until he was standing directly in front of me. "Oh, I think you understand perfectly. Going to Jasper's kingdom, without my knowledge, assisting in civil war. Civil war! And then bringing home Elliot. Don't you understand how many things you just jeopardized? How much is at—"
"Look at your son." My interruption caught him off guard, and he stopped talking instantly. "Just look at your son and then tell me I shouldn't have brought him home."
He blinked quickly, turning his face to look at Elliot, who he had walked by without noticing at all. You didn't have to know what Elliot had gone through to see how changed he was. It wasn't just how thin and pale he was. It was his eyes. The king saw it all, understood more then could be told, and his whole face changed, anger wiped away.
"Elliot." His voice was unsteady, his face uncertain of how to approach his youngest child. I'd never seen him look so nervous in my entire life.
"You son of a bitch."
I glanced up in surprise at the harshness of Elliot's voice. I'd never heard him sound anywhere close to how angry he sounded now.
"Elliot, I—"
"You what? You're sorry?" He spat, and the king physically flinched at the strength of his anger.
"You sent me there! You sold me! All for the sake of your country's damn peace! And now that I'm finally away from him, you want me to go back. You come in here yelling at Thomas because he finally dragged me away from that monster. What kind of fucked up parent are you?"
His anger was reaching a peak now, and Raymond moves to stand behind him, careful not to touch him, but ready to pull him back if he needed to. He began to talk to him quietly, and little by little I saw Elliot's anger start to fade, replaced by the desire to be anywhere but here.
"Don't come near me. Don't you dare try to send me back, and don't try to apologize. Nothing you can say will ever repair the trust I had in you. No amount of explaining will make me forgive you. Thomas was right. Look at your son. Look at the mess he's become."
And with that he fled from the room, shoving past the guards who stood by the doors, not even noticing his weeping mother who stood in the hall. Raymond followed quickly after him, stopping the wrap his arms quickly around our mother.
There was a stunned silence, made more awkward by the presence of Jay, Cam and Alan, who had witnessed something perhaps only our family should have seen. Alan looked like he would have given the world to be in Raymond's place.
My father turned back to face me, and for the first time in my life, I saw tears in his eyes.
———————
"Hey, you're sitting up!" I had forced a smile before entering our room, but they joy at seeing him leaning against the headboard, was genuine.
"Barely." His laugh was breathy, the strain of sitting even for a short time, showing in his face.
"Yes, and only for a very short while." The nurse standing next to his bed reminded him, and he stuck out his tongue at her as soon as she turned her back.
"Yes, yes, you said that already." He sighed, his gaze following me as I moved to stand next to him.
"He really only should sit up for a minute or two more, Your Highness. He needs to take things slow. He was lucky none of his organs were seriously damaged, but the amount of blood vessels broken was rather serious, and isn't cured overnight."
"I understand, and I'll make sure he lays back down as soon as his time is up." I smiled reassuringly at her, and after she fussed around for a few seconds more, she seemed content to leave Alex in my care.
"I don't mind telling you that this is harder then it looks, and I don't even want to sit up for more then a minute. I just wanted you to see." His smile was slightly embarrassed, and I leaned forward to kiss his cheek.
"I'm so proud of you." I told him gently, and his face lit up.
"Good, then help me to lay down."
I laughed, but did as he asked, being as careful as possible as I helped him adjust. He looked almost too happy at the way I fussed around him, but at this point I didn't even care.
"You look tired." I must have spaced out while I was putting the blankets around him, because I'm sure my face showed the concern I had been trying to keep away from him.
"It's nothing, I—"
His hand gently cupped my cheek, and I was forced to look into his sincere blue eyes.
"Somethings bothering you and I want to know about it."
"You know me too well." I sighed and stood up. He smiled, but waited for me to continue.
I told him about everything that had happened at dinner. How my father had left only minutes after Elliot had stormed away. My mother's heartbroken tears and the way she looked after his retreating figure. I'd never forget the look in her eyes.
I didn't even realize I was pacing the whole time, until I had finished telling the story.
"I'm worried about him. I'm so worried. He's so full of hatred, and so broken. It's like he's getting worse everyday."
I glanced over at Alex, who was listening intently, eyes focused on my face.
"And it's not just that." I sighed, running a hand across my face.
"What is it, Tommy?" I looked up at his gentle tone, and met his concerned eyes.
"The last few nights...I didn't want to bother you when you need your sleep...I'm dreaming again." I stopped pacing, sitting on the edge of the bed near him. "And I'm so tired of him still having a hold on me."
I felt his hand rest gently on my back, and I sighed at his touch. Only months ago, I would have pulled away, but now I welcomed this gentle reassurance that he was there, and wasn't going to leave me.
"I want to get help. I want to find someone that I can talk to about this, and I want...I want to be free of him, once and for all."
I looked over at Alex, saw the tears in his eyes, and blinked back my own.
"And I know Elliot needs help. I can hardly expect him to listen to me about that if I haven't even tried it myself."
"Come lay next to me so I can hug you." Was his only reply, and I instantly obeyed.
He shifted so that he was laying on his side, and once his arms were around me, I let out the breath I hadn't noticed I was holding in.
"I don't know if I'm ready to just start talking to someone about it. I kept it a secret for so long. Do you...do you think I'm strong enough?" I couldn't meet his eyes, my own pulled down by the weight of all the years I had called myself weak for what I had allowed to happen to me.
"I've never met anyone as strong as you, Thomas."
I instantly looked up at him, and he pulled me into a deep, meaningful kiss. When he pulled away, he rested his forehead on mine, eyes looking directly into my own.
"I'm so proud of you."
End of Why the Straight One? Chapter 59. Continue reading Chapter 60 or return to Why the Straight One? book page.