Without You [KongpobArthit 18+] - Chapter 3: Chapter 3

*Kongpob's POV*
Standing in front of the bathroom sink, I nervously dry my freshly-washed hands. I had been pacing around anxiously in the dining area before heading to the bathroom for a chance to clear my head.
He could come through that front door at any moment.
In a few minutes, I'll be face-to-face with the man I walked away from, yet who still holds my heart in his soft hands.
I know that when I see him, I'm going to want to gather him in my arms and reclaim those lips I have missed so much. To shower him with all the love and affection I deprived both of us of for the past two years.
But I can't. I need to stay strong.
Two years ago, I took a leap and asked Arthit if we could finally tell our families about our relationship. I've always been really close to my parents, but having to keep my boyfriend a secret caused a strain on our relationship. And the worse part was that my parents didn't even know why our relationship was strained. It was mostly on my end, because I felt so guilty about hiding a huge part of my life for so many years. I expected Arthit to understand that and let me tell them, but... I was wrong.
It's not like I was asking to come out to the entire world. Just our families. Our closest friends already knew about our relationship, so I still can't understand why Arthit was so reluctant to tell our parents.
I had hoped his love for me was strong enough to surpass his fears... but it wasn't.
Deciding I've spent enough time moping in the bathroom, I jump up and down a few times to shake off my nerves before heading back to the dining area. As soon as I step out, I wish I could turn around and go back into hiding.
My gaze falls upon round, dark eyes, piercing into my soul the way only his can. Those pouty lips that part slightly in shock, looking at sweet as they did on the first day we met. His creamy skin is smooth and utterly kissable, making my lips yearn to pepper kisses around his entire face. Arthit is still the picture of perfection, although I never expected that to change.
A delicate blush dusts his cheeks as we stare at each other for the first time in two years. Standing here, right now, my reason for breaking up with him seems ridiculous. All I want is to scoop him up and carry him far away from here so we can reconcile. I nearly do it too, until Em calls my name.
"Kong!" Em calls out, tugging my sleeve. "Sit here, with me and May."
I tear my gaze away, forcing a smile at my two friends as I take my seat. I've been friends with Em and May long before they were even dating. Now, they're married with their first child on the way. Em used to think his crush on May was hopeless, so it always warms my heart to see them so happy together.
Even with Oak sitting on the other side of us, talking my ear off, my focus doesn't waver from my lov— former lover. He's smiling so brilliantly, falling back into that confident boy I knew in college as he's surrounded by his friends.
"How's your family?" Arthit asks Knot; the sound of his smooth voice causing pleasurable goosebumps to arise on my skin.
"My wife is still recovering from having our daughter," Knot responds. "I offered to stay home tonight, but she insisted that I get out for some fresh air. Her mother came by to help out while I'm gone."
The group continues to converse, laughing every so often, but I tune it all out. All I can hear is my deafening annoyance over Arthit talking to everyone except for me. I know I don't have a right to be mad, but fuck, I am. I want him to notice me.
"Arthit," I call out tightly, making his cheeks turn pink as he blinks in surprise. "Aren't you going to greet me?"
In his dark eyes, I can see a swirl of emotions colliding in his mind. When you're with someone for a long time, you're able to pick up on how they're feeling by the subtle ways their pupils shake, or how their tongue darts long their bottom lip. Arthit's angry with me, but he's holding it back.
I don't want him to hold back, I realize. I want him to show me clearly that he's missed me, that our break up affected him. That it hasn't only been me suffering for these past two years. If he can just show me something, anything, to prove all of that, then I can believe our breakup was a mistake.
"Hello, Kongpob," Arthit greet me with an overly-formal tone that skyrockets my annoyance. "It's been a while."
I scoff, ticking my jaw. "It has been," I respond, mocking his cool tone. "How have you been? You look well."
"I am well, thanks," he fires back, eyes gleaming with the challenge.
From an outsider's perspective, we are simply two old friends catching up with polite conversation. But to us, we know it's a lot deeper than that. Two former lovers, trying to push the other to see who will be the first to snap. Words aren't necessary for me to know that Arthit is challenging me; keeping his tone calm and polite as he purposefully pisses me off. Perhaps this is his way of finally getting back at me for the break up. Or maybe he's simply missed the way we used to argue, so full of passion and fire. Either way, it's a challenge I'm not backing down from.
"You seem like you've been doing well, Kong," Prem cuts in, eyes flickering uncomfortably between me and Arthit. Wad holds Prem's hand, and I try to ignore the sting that accompanies the memory of when I use to hold Arthit's hand.
"I have been," I tell him, somewhat honestly. "I mean, life has its ups and downs, but the earth doesn't stop turning. Isn't that right?"
The statement is directed towards Prem, but my eyes narrow at Arthit. He glares back, taking a sip of his drink.
"I supposed so," Prem agrees slowly. He leans over to whisper something to Knot and Bright, who shrug in response.
"Hey, Kong!" Bright suddenly exclaims. "Are you dating anyone?"
"Bright!" Knot hisses as Prem smacks his palm to his forehead. The red coloring in Arthit's cheeks deepen, and his eyes zero in on me intensely as he waits for my answer.
Arthit's eyes soften, the challenging look replaced with one of quiet pleading. It makes my heart ache to see him look so vulnerable that I immediately cave, ready to tell them that I haven't dated anyone in two years.
"Actually—"
"Because Arthit is dating!" Bright announces, making my breath catch in my throat.
Arthit's eyes widen as he looks to his friend. Knot and Prem's jaws drop at the revelation, while my friends cast me sympathetic glances.
"Y-You are?" I whisper, hating the way my voice cracks along with my heart. Pain fills Arthit's eyes, and his mouth opens to respond.
"Of course he is!" Bright cuts him off. "Don't you know how popular our Arthit is? He could only hold them back for so long before finally giving in!"
My stomach twists as the nausea arises. My Arthit is... dating someone else? Another person has held him, kissed him, made love to him like I did?
The room around me begins to close in as the air becomes limited. I can't be here. I can't sit here, knowing I brought this pain on myself for leaving. I have to leave, now.
"Congratulations again, Bright," I mumble, standing on shaky legs. My vision tunnels as I stumble towards the exit, ignoring the voices of my friends calling me back.
Only one voice makes it through to my muddled mind, and it's the one that hurts the most.